When It Rains

Chapter 5: A Low Point

After that day, we slowly moved in separate directions.  As the days got warmer and longer Dimitri's cross country practices became more demanding.  The only time I would be able to see him is during zoom lectures for philosophy.  After that day our library visits almost ceased and we would maintain contact through text alone.  But slowly our conversations became dragged on through the days and slowly our texts became far and in between.  I understand he's busy, just feels a little empty, a little lost without going to the library with him.

Two weeks after our small library incident, I was in the middle of campus listening to James Arthur belt "Say You Won't Let Go" in my headphones. The abnormally warm day meant no clouds to be seen and the sun felt fresh on my skin. The people of campus didn't waste a second of sunlight. Shouting and yelling, having fun as some of them had a couple picnic dates. A big group of people play frisbee in an open stretch of grass. Three guys threw a football off to my left and I couldn't help but imagine one of them catching my peripheral vision, Dimitri running up to me while throwing his hands around my-.

*Stop, he doesn't care about you.  Move on.*

The lone thought made the small hole in my chest just a little bigger. The hot weather doing nothing to fill it. I balled my fists and forced my way through the shifting groups of people. Out of the courtyard and towards my dorm building.

"What's up, little man?" Bella teased as I walked in the door.

"Just got done with classes but I need to watch these lectures before tomorrow."  I replied giving her the casual 'fuck you' look that we ever so often just glared at one another with. Just to mess with her.  She paid no mind to it.

"When's your next exam?"  She questioned spinning in her chair while giving off weird giggles that seemed contagious.

I giggled as well and replied, "Honestly, not really sure.  I know it's soon."

"Well, get this.  I have three exams coming up in the next two weeks.  Literally exams Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday."  She stopped spinning, but the dizziness in her eyes said otherwise.

"Ew, no I'm good." I chuckled as I pulled out my laptop.

I grabbed my blue covered science notebook.  Without hesitation or missing a beat Dimitri and my argument rang through my ears.

'What a disaster.' I called out.

'Oh yeah, I'll consult you next time I need to have a check up on my colors.'  He joked through his beautifully thick accent.

I flipped it open the back of the nearest used page.  I pressed play on the first video and began writing out my notes.  I finish another video.  And another.  And slowly my notebook filled with notes of something I had a very loose understanding of.

After about an hour or two, however long it took to forget what was happening, I finally took a break. Taking time to enjoy the sunlight that came through the window. Realizing I was wasting the day away, maybe I should at least try to take advantage of it when I did. By deciding on the one activity I hated; going on a run.

I got up out of my seat and walked to my dresser.  I pulled out the day's work out, outfit.  Just some old soccer shorts and a black dry-fit shirt.

*God I miss soccer.*

Grabbing my headphones and heading for the door, I spoke over my shoulder, "I'm gonna go on a run.  I'll be back in like an hour."

I didn't wait for her response as I closed the door and made my way out the nearest exit.. Walking to the end of the street where an intersection sat.  The flash of a red ladybug caught my attention as it zipped by.