Secrets Surfacing {Spencer Reid}

6.

"Remember that the stars and planets did not die for you to waste your time wondering if you are pretty enough or worthy enough to exist." -Nikita Gill 

 a week after the prince case my eyesight became blurrier. when I passed out at the round table and hotch catches me, that's when he called the ambulance. I had a pulse but just wasn't waking up. I was sped off into the ambulance as the team followed behind. I was slipping in and out of consciousness, but still couldn't understand wha was happening. until I realized that there was always a chance for the cancer to come back. this was one of those times.

"stop messing with your IV" Spencer says holding my hand from itching the IV. "I'm so sorry Spencer. there's something I have to tell you-" as I finish my sentence the doctor comes in with a disappointed look on his face."It's back" the doctor told me in my hospital bed. "what's back? what's wrong doctor?" Spencer said shuffling from looking at the doctor and back to me. "Spence..." "no, don't baby me right now. tell what's happening." I sigh as tears stream down my cheeks,  and the doctor walks out the room. 

"I have brain cancer. I had a tumor was removed last year, removing it was risky, but it has now grown rapidly. this one will be even more risky to remove." his face read disbelief all over it. "but you were out in the field. you were fine..." he started to leave. I tried to grab him but my IV was holding me back. I could lose everything. the odds weren't good. 10% survival rate. I however, am opting to get surgery. if there was a chance, I was going down fighting. that's how I explained it to the rest of the team at the hospital.

 they understood right away, but Spencer still didn't want to. he couldn't live without the love of his life. I held his hand tightly and he finally accepted it and he began to sob. in the end, it was ultimately my choice and he knew that. "guys I have an idea" Garcia exclaimed. she had a huge smile on her face. she wanted to cheer everyone up since I would most likely not make it out alive. 

I could still eat so she brought in some snacks and turned on some cheesy movie on the small hospital tv. Reid made sure that Garcia got me the same snack that I got on the first night we met. we all talked about the worst possible movies and how I would never watch them. while I watched this one, we all laughed and criticized the movie plot. it was great. it distracted everyone from the inevitable. 

the rest of the time was spent sharing stories and making fun of each other. this was the first time I smiled since I had been in the hospital. my team could always do that, make the best out of a bad situation. even after visiting hours were up, the doctor allowed everyone to stay. I also saw Jack and Henry one last time. "Aunty Daphne!" they yelled when they ran through the door. I hugged them tightly and told them how much I loved them. 6am rolled around quicker than I wanted it to. it was time. 

one by one the team hugged me and stepped out of the room. when they wheeled me out in my wheelchair, they lined the hallway. they smiled as I passed by. I started to cry. at the end stood Spencer. I looked deep into his hazel eyes. "before you go in, there something we need to do." he was in a tux and gave me a white rose. he took place of the nurse wheeling me and took me to what looked like a scene from a Disney movie. the cafeteria was put together to look like a ball room, like the one where we danced on the prince case. 

he grabbed my arm and walked me to the middle of the room, playing the same song that was playing when we were at the bar the first time we met: This is Home by Cavetown. me and Spencer slowly swayed to the music, letting the beat control  our movements. I had my head on his chest and I listened to his heartbeat. I listened to it quicken when I first placed my head there and then feeling it slow. "I love you so much." he whispered. I'm using my last bit of strength to have this last final dance. I made him promise no tears back at the hospital room, so far he's keeping his word. I looked up at him and he kissed me. it was long and passionate, filled with lots of love. 

"can you promise me one more thing?" he looked confused but nodded. "if I don't make it out, I want you to move on and be happy. you deserve it." the words echoed as the song started to slow down.  "I'll do it, for you. but it's not going to happen." he gave an air filled laugh. the nurse came back it when the song finally came to a stop. I have to go back. "I love you so much, always know that." I whispered. a single tear escaped his eye but he tried staying strong. his lip quivered and he bit it. "I love you Daphne." he cupped my cheek and gave me another long lasting kiss. 

even with me now in a hospital bed, he held my hand all the way to the surgery doors. I turned around and saw his face through the door slowly get farther and farther away. I smiled and returned to looking at the ceiling. as they put the mask on me, I relived my life. all my birthdays, Spencer's and I's first kiss, all the late nights, me and Derek dancing it out, babysitting Henry and Jack. I finally closed my eyes.