Lovesick Witches

Letting Go

The door to the potions lab glared down on me as I raised a fist to knock. 

"Come in," her icy voice called. 

I walked inside and Hecate was sitting at her usual front desk, looking beautiful as always. My heart dropped as if it weighed a million tonnes when I looked into her eyes with the knowledge of what I was about to do. 

"Ana," she said with a much warmer tone. I had to look away. I felt sick. 

"Are you alright my lovely?" 

As she said this, I couldn't stop my eyes from pooling with water. But I tried to hold it back. 

"Hecate," I said in a stern voice as I tried my hardest to keep myself together. I took a few steps closer to her until we were almost touching. If that was the last moment I would have with her, I wanted to be close to her, no matter how much hurt that caused me. 

"I can't do this anymore," I said, noticing a single tear leave my eye, rolling down my face. Her soft, vulnerable eyes gazed into mine as I experienced a dagger pierce through my soul. The pain was almost unbearable. I loved her. She was my entire world and I was about to let go of her. 

"Do what anymore?" she questioned, reaching out her hand to me, her gorgeous, long nails making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. 

I wanted to place my hand in hers. I wanted to tell her that I loved her. I longed that I could fall into her arms. But the pain grew as I forced myself to take a step away from her. 

I looked back into Hecate's youthful eyes as a look of worry painted across her face. She gazed, helplessly, back into my eyes and all I could see was her soft, sensitive soul beneath. She was broken. She needed someone there for her. Her delicate heart was hanging on by its last threads after all the damage it had been through. 

Hecate was the strongest, bravest, toughest person I had ever met. Yet inside, she was in pieces. She was lonely. Insecure. Vulnerable. In need of protection. In need of comfort. Her eyeballs twinkled in the light of the potions lab as they drowned themselves in a thin layer of water. She was completely helpless. 

"I'm breaking up with you, Hecate," I whispered, the words barely escaping my mouth as if they were begging not to. But I forced them out. 

I dropped my head and focused on a spot on the floor beneath me to attempt to hide my tears. I didn't want her to see how upset I was, breaking up with her. So I gulped, bringing my tears back in and bottling them up inside of me. I managed to find the courage to look back up at her. And when I did, I was completely heartbroken to see that the floods of water surrounding Hecate's eyeballs had now left her eyelids and were uncontrollably flowing down her cheeks. 

A knife stabbed through my gut as I looked into her broken soul, guilt from the pain I was causing her suffocating me until I was drowning in my own sorrow, unable to breathe. 

"But why?" she asked, her powerless tone scraping the walls of my heart. 

"It's just," I started, my voice barely even a whisper, "you are my teacher. We should never have dated in the first place." It wrecked me to say that to her, my whole body now aching in agony. 

Hecate nodded, unable to speak as more tears streamed down her face. I didn't think she would have reacted like this. Maybe she cared about me more than I had thought. But it didn't matter now. Because I had just torn her apart, as well as myself. 

My stomach gurgled as the tears I had bottled up inside of me expanded, pushing their way back up to my eyes. 

"I understand," she said, attempting to form a weak smile underneath her sobs. 

I couldn't keep my tears in any longer as they were filling up my body with sadness. The pain throbbed more and more the longer I looked at Hecate. I couldn't take any more of it. So I turned and ran out of the potions classroom and into the corridor, banging the door shut behind me. 

Just as I got into the corridor, the bottle of tears exploded, causing water to ride, rapidly, out through my eyes. There was no one else in the dark, lonely corridor as I ran through it, trying to get as far away from the potions classroom as I could. 

I knew it would have upset Hecate a little bit. But I didn't expect her to cry. I didn't think I meant that much to her. Seeing her like that was unbearable for me, making me flee from the classroom. 

I leaned up against a wall and sobbed. I didn't realise it would be that hard to let go of her. But I had an awful feeling that the bruises you gained from leaving the person you loved wouldn't just disappear.