Like Those Foreign Stars (Zeke Yeager x Gender Neutral!Reader)

Chapter 11: I'm Tired

A/N: I'm not proud of this chapter but anyways i just listened to a mix on yt called "slowly losing hope on humanity's freedom; armin's playlist" by tsukeiji. i love Armin so much i just wanna give him a hug and a kith cuz he needs it (╯︵╰,)

Word Count: 1282

"No one's going to give me a hand here? Please stop glaring at each other." Hange complained as they stirred the stew in the pot.

You were sat around a campfire again but you were surrounded by a lot more comrades this time. Using the word "comrades" lightly. You and what was left of the Survey Corps teamed up with the Marleyan soldiers and warriors. You didn't exactly consider them to be your comrades.

"Huh," Magath began, "Sharing a meal with people whom we have killed and who have killed us so horribly. That's interesting. Why did you change your mind? If you just left Eren Yeager alone, you lot would see the world you wished for become a reality, right? A paradise for the island devils. We were this close to preventing Eren and Zeke from coming into contact with each other. If you hadn't interfered, that is."

"It is, as I explained, Mister General. We do not wish for mass murder. If we did, we wouldn't have run and hidden inside a forest to make some stew." Hange tried reassuring Magath.

"In other words, you're telling me you developed a sense of justice." Magath said.

"Justice, you say?" Jean butted in, "Did you just talk about justice, right now? You of all people?"

Jean balled up his fists before pointing an accusatory finger at Magath.

"We lived under the threat of Titans you kept sending after us but we're the bad guys?! You hear that?! The reason why we fought desperately is that we didn't want to die devoured by Titans! Are you trying to say that was us acting like devils, you old fuck?!"

"Yeah... you look like devils, alright. The theories about the threat Paradis posed turned out to be true and the world is now about to be destroyed. This is the result you guys fighting to the death led to. Am I wrong?"

"Hold on... To begin with, if the walls hadn't been broken down and his Mom hadn't been eaten right in front of him, Eren would've never done this! Are you sure you aren't the ones who chased after the rumbling?!"

"Hey, are we talking about history, now? You understand that Eldia's the one who made Marley suffer and trampled over them first, don't you?"

You tried to interrupt their argument, "Hey, guys! You're making everyone unco-"

"How long are you going to keep playing the victim for something that dates back to two thousand years ago?!" Jean continued to yell despite your efforts to stop him.

"It really feels like I'm talking to a brat," Magath said, "You think that silly nonsense is worth anything in the face of two thousand years of real, actual history?"

"What'd you say?!"

"Aah... Let's stop this," Hange said, successfully silencing them, "This talk about two-thousand-year-old quarrels that none of us saw with our own eyes is just dull. Jean, Mister General is obviously bewildered by our existence. We're strange devils who are willing to even give up on their paradise to rescue the people of the world that tried to eradicate them. We spent several months in the outside world. We can't go back to being ignorant devils, anymore."

Jean turned his back to them as Magath had finally grown silent.

"Well then," Annie said suddenly, "Are you prepared to kill him?"

"Eh?" Armin said, sounding confused.

"Are you able to kill Eren?"

You and your remaining friends looked at each other with solemn faces that soon turned somewhat melancholy.

Killing Eren. The boy that you've seen grow and change for years is now on a trek to exterminate nearly all of humanity. It sounded... absurd.

"Killing Eren isn't the only way to stop him." Mikasa said.

"I thought you'd say that. But... what would that be?" Annie asked, "Are you going to talk to him or something? Would someone who'd change their mind because of that commit genocide?"

"We don't know that unless we try talking to Eren." Armin said.

"Then, assuming we can have a conversation with him, what will we do if he doesn't stop the genocide? Should we try not to think about the final option as much as possible?"

Everyone looked away from Annie, at a loss for words. No one could think of an answer.

"I knew it. If we, who have a hometown in Marley, try to kill Eren, you're going to end up fighting us to protect Eren, surely," Annie paused before looking to Mikasa, "That's it after all, isn't it, Mikasa? Because you probably have never thought of anything being more important than Eren."

"In other words, are you saying you have to kill me?" Mikasa said, pulling out the handgrips of her 3DM Gear.

Without hesitation, Annie positioned her thumb over the sharp object on her ring to shift into her Titan form.

"W-Wait-" You said, in shock.

"Eeh?!" Hange said, their voice slightly raised.

"Leonhart!" Magath shouted.

Everyone became tense until Annie raised a hand and her expression softened, changing into one of worry.

"I understand your feelings well. Me too. I have one reason to want to stop Eren. I don't want my Father in Marley to be killed. That's why I'm helping you. If we can stop Eren by talking to him, that's fine. If nothing else, we don't have any reason to fight until then."

Mikasa thought about it for a short while before she acquiesced in Annie's decision, putting her handgrips away with a quiet "Got it." before turning away.

"Come on! The stew's ready! Let's eat!"

...

"And you." Magath said, pointing to you.

"Me?" You asked, pointing to yourself.

"You had plenty of chances to stop Zeke from coming into contact with Eren. You had plenty of chances to kill him. But you didn't. You're partly to blame for the rumbling."

Your whole body went rigid for a second before you sighed, instantly feeling exhausted from the arguing you've had to hear tonight. You didn't want to hear anymore.

"I'm tired. Please, not now-"

"No, I wanna know. You let him get away. Why did you let him get away? Is it b-"

"BECAUSE-!" You suddenly shouted as you got up from your spot on the ground. You didn't mean to burst out in anger so you tried reeling yourself back in. But the tears forming at your eyes prevented you from doing so.

"Because..." Your voice started to break and become shaky, "Shit! because I thought Levi was dead! I wasn't thinking about anything but my husband being dead! Killing Zeke was the least of my fucking worries at the moment!"

"That isn't an excuse as to why you weren't able to kill him."

"What more do you expect from me?! Did you expect me to just magically get over it and just kill without a second thought?!"

"No. But I do expect you to prioritize humanity before yourself. You're a soldier, it's what you're supposed to do."

"Ugh…" you groaned weakly, feeling defeated, "You're right."

You slowly sat back down, bringing your knees up to your chest and resting your chin on your knees.

"Wait, Y/N, you can't just give up that quickly!" Jean told you, his voice starting to raise a bit, "Stand up to him! Show this asshole that you aren't the weak soldier that he thinks you are!"

"Jean," Hange said calmly, lecturing Jean yet again, "Y/N's problems are Y/N's problems, not yours."

Jean begrudgingly sat back down with a huff.

You were just ready to get this over with. You were ready to confront Zeke. You would never admit it but you wanted to see him again.

END - 3/14/21, 3/15/21, 3/16/21, 3/17/21, 3/18/21, 3/19/21

A/N: i just wanna wring magath's neck