clean slate | charlie swan

~ the one with charlies freedom

Alex blushes deeply. "He... He knew? He did that?"

Esme nods. "See what I mean? His love for you is so strong. I bet he's hurting just as much being away from you."

Alex nods small and takes a shaky breath. "I hope."

Esme stands and puts the food in the empty fridge. "Right, here is what we are going to do. You are going to go for a bath or a shower and get yourself ready for the day. I shall take Oliver for a quick walk and then we will go to the hospital - I made you an appointment with an OB-GYN and you're gonna see that baby. Then we'll grab some shopping and tidy up a little for when Charlie finally comes home. Okay?"

Alex blushes and nods small, quietly heading upstairs. Despite how old she knows Esme is, her looks aways throw her off - she looks so youthful, so young. She takes a quick shower and washes her hair, tying as much of it back as she can. She changes into some leggings and an oversized knit jumper, heading downstairs just as Esme comes back with Olly.

"All sorted?" Esme smiles, hanging the leash up.

Alex nods and smiles small. "Thank you... I'm sure you have so many better things to do than baby sit a middle aged hormonal pregnant lady."

Esme laughs. "There's nowhere I'd rather be."

-

Alex digests the news the doctor told her. "How did I never notice?" She mutters.

Esme walks beside her as they head to the car. "It's not always evident how pregnant someone is. You may look huge but only be half way or tiny and be due any day."

"But three months? How haven't I noticed? Why didn't Carlisle notice?" Alex asks, stopping.

Esme laughs and turns to face her in the hall. "Carlisle is an emergency doctor. He doesn't do babies and stuff, but he can vaguely read scans and things. It was a whole new territory when Bella had Nessie."

Alex pulls the picture out again. "I'm 14 weeks, Esme, that's insane. I've been pregnant for over three months and I didn't know."

"I know, hon, but you know now. You can take care of yourself now." Esme says. "Did you want to go to the store in town or the next town over?"

"I wanna go lay down." Alex sighs.

"Okay, that's fine. I'll take you home and have Alice go to the store." Esme says.

"I just... Can I go home alone, please? Thank you for bringing me and stuff but I-I need a moment alone to digest this."

Esme nods. "Of course, let's get you home."

It isn't long before Alex is left alone, her back pushed against the front door. She takes a few deep breaths before she let's out a scream, letting it all out before she pants, takes a deep breath and goes to the couch. Olly runs over and sits by her, startled and in protective mode, but he soon settles to her touch.

"You're gonna be a big brother a lot sooner than we thought, buddy." She whispers.

"Huh?"

Alex jumps up and stares at the doorway. "Cha-Charlie!" She cries, covering her mouth. "You're home!!!"

He nods, pushing his damp hair back. "I am... I jumped straight in the shower. Can we-can we back track a second? Big brother?"

Alex bites her lip, her heart racing. "Yeah... I-I got some news the other day. And-And I wanted to tell you as soon as I could. Then everything happened and-and you were gone and I-"

"Alex, spit it out." Charlie frowns, worried. He's already on edge, he's missed her a lot and just wants to hug her, but he senses she has something to say.

Alex takes a deep breath. "I'm pregnant."

Silence.

Charlie stands frozen, his jaw hanging open from where it dropped open. He stares at her wide eyed and shocked, speechless. Alex stares back, her legs like jelly and her mind going wild.

She instantly begins to ramble. "We never talked about this because it was never a possibility but now it is and I totally understand if you want me to leave, you didn't sign up for this. It was such a shock to me and I wanted you to be first to know but then everything happened and I panicked and I've been so worried and my stomach has been queasy and now I find out I'm further along than I thought and-"

Charlie unfreeze and takes long strides over pulling her into a deep kiss to silence her. Alex theses up but melts into him, closing her eyes for a moment. When he eventually pulls away, his eyes are glistened with a few tears. "I... I'm gonna be such an old dad but right now I don't care. A baby? Really?" He breathes.

Alex smiles and nods, cupping his face. "A mini Swan." She whispers. "I didn't think it would ever happen and I was okay with that but now it has? I get to have a mini you."

"I... How?" He asks, sitting down and pulling her with him.

She sits on his lap, tucking some stray hair back. "I don't know. Carlisle called it a miracle and I guess it really is, it was impossible but it still happened. I'm 14 weeks and 3 days along apparently and it's apparently like 3.5 inches long so far and apparently should have hair by now. You wanna see it?"

Charlie nods, still trying to process this. He takes the scan photo Alex pulls from her pocket, staring at the grainy image. "I can't... Really see much."

"There's the head. And the body. That's a hand. And there's a leg." Alex points. "I only know because the doctor pointed them out like 5 times." She blushes.

Charlie exhales slowly. "You're not showing yet?"

Alex shakes her head and subconsciously moves both hands to her belly. "Not yet, but soon apparently." She smiles small. It won't feel real for her until then.

"Can I... Feel?" He asks.

Alex smiles and nods, pulling her jumper up. She pulls his hand to her flat tummy. "I told it you'd be home soon."

"You gotta stop calling them an it." Charlie says, his hand gently rubbing her belly. "Shim, that's an alternative."

"Shim?" Alex raises an eyebrow. "No. How about speck?"

"Anything but it." He nods. "God, we have so much to catch up on... But let me cherish this moment. Just a little longer."