Reid My Mind

Wake up...

⚠️ *SEASON EIGHT SPOILERS* ⚠️
Play the song when '**' pops up :)

It had been two weeks since that night with Spencer. You hadn't talked to him at all since he had done one of the stupidest things you had ever thought he would do. While talking down an unsub, he put his gun down with one pointed straight at his head with no back up. You didn't like to admit it but you hated to think that if one thing had gone wrong that he would be dead. You couldn't see yourself living without Spencer. He was your light, ever since your boyfriend Jack had died you have never loved or trusted someone as much.

The BAU had off days since there were no major cases. You were pretty okay about it since you needed a break and since you didn't want to see Spencer. You decided that you would have a self care day. Before you had hopped in the shower you had put in an order for Chinese takeout.

You hopped out of the shower and threw on an oversized UCLA shirt and shorts when you heard a knock at the door. You thought to yourself how fast the food had came as you opened the door. Instead of seeing the Chinese food your stomach was longing for you opened the door to see Spencer standing there.

"Y/n can we please talk, please?" Spencer asks his voice slightly cracking as you decide to let him in.

"About what, Spencer" You say as you putting the emphasis on the last letter of his name.

"Why won't you talk to me? You haven't answered any texts from me and I don't know why" Spencer starts as he paces the room

"Oh..well let's see, maybe because you put not only put your life, the teams life and a hostages life at stake." You say as you start to raise you voice

" Well, what did you want me to do Y/n? Let him shoot her instead?" Her states as his voice gets more irritated "And why the hell do you even care, You weren't the one in front of the gun. Your life wasn't in danger." He says now shouting

As your tone matches his you yell "Actually, it was, Spencer I can't lose anyone else that I love..I-I can't go through pain that again" you start to hold back sobs

" What..what do you mean by again?" He says lowering his tone to an almost whisper

" Back in California, I had a boyfriend..he was shot and killed while walking to my dorm. His killers were never caught, that is why I joined this field. I owe it to him to catch them, s-since I was the reason he died" You say as you let your water works flow free.

Spencer slowly walks over to you, not knowing what to say. You had never told anyone at the BAU that story. You were afraid they would think less of you if you even uttered a word about it. You collapse to the floor in Spencer's arms as he whispers, "it's okay" and "I'm here" in your ears. As you start to calm down,Spencer pulls you off the floor as both of you sit in the couch.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't know" He says looking at you with apologetic eyes

"No one does, you are the first person I've told" You sigh as he runs his finger through your hair.
Just as he was about to say something a knock at the door rings through the quiet room.
Spencer gets up and opens the door, the Chinese food had arrived. He sat in on kitchen island. He walks to the door slightly turning it before you stop him.

"C-can you stay? Please" You look up at him with tears still lingering in your eyes

" Yeah, I can" he says as he slipped his shoes off and walks back over to you

You both sit in a comfortable silence content with the touch Spencer and you provide eachother, until Spencer breaks it.

"A-about 4 years ago I got these headaches, so I got in contact with a doctor and we started talking, I couldn't actually see her in person because she had a stalker." He looked you in the eyes as he sighed starting to continue "s-she was kidnapped by her stalker and killed right in front of me. I c-couldn't save her, she trusted me and I didn't save her" He finishes looking down at the ground

You reach over and grab his hands which makes him look up at you. You grab his chin and wipe the tears streaming out of his eyes with your thumb.

" Spence, it's not your fault." You say look into his eyes. You pull him back into your chest embracing him and run your fingers through his hair

Spencer had never showed these parts of himself, you wished you could take all his pain away. But the only thing you could do is be there for him. After a while you get up and walk over to the kitchen island. You come back with two lukewarm boxes of Chinese food and two forks. You hand one to Spencer. You look of TV for shows, settling on Julie and the phantoms.

"Is this a kids show?" Spencer says slightly laughing

"No, it's a cinematic experience" you say laughing

**Just as you say that the song Wake up comes on.
You stand up as you start singing using your fork as a microphone , being your most dramatic self.

"AND YOU USE YOUR PAIN..BECAUSE IT MAKES YOU, YOU." You say as you mess up your hair for effect.

"WAKE UP, WAKE UP IF IT'S ALL YOU DOOO" You sing as you grab Spencer's hands to stand with you.

"LOOK OUT LOOK INSIDE OF YOUUU" You sing as you push yourself into him softly

He starts laughing as you sing your heart out to the song. You both start dancing to the song. You trip over your own feet and you both fall to the floor laughing. He pulls you closer to him on the floor. You stand yourself up and then help him up. He pulls you towards him in a needy kiss. You both raw, emotional and bare of defenses. You look into his eyes. Smiling at him as he pulls you into one more long kiss.

Maybe Spencer Reid isn't that bad.

A/n: Okay a bit of a sad chapter...but you and Spencer seem to like each other! And two chapters in one day, who is she??? Did I add a Julie and the phantoms reference, YES I DID. I had so much fun writing this chapter! Thanks for reading!!