Dream Journal

The Future is Scary

~picture is not mine, only found on google images~

 The world is melting down, coming to a nuclear breakdown of all plants. Everyone is to meet at churches across their towns. I'm scared. Everyone packs their belongings, that they want to keep in the New Beginning. The government has told the world that everyone deemed worthy will be sent to a new start for a new life. My husband got the 'golden ticket' for our family to be one of them. I am so proud of him for working so hard his entire life to earn this. As we pack everything and the two kids into the truck we headed out. No words were said, not even by the talkative 3-year-old. Everyone was scared. We arrived at the church where the government has armed forces stationed in every direction. My husband tagged our bags and such with his last name on them. We were never really married just, common law, so my last name never changed. I'm scared that we'll be separated. The line didn't move very fast, but once we entered I held my kids close to me as Cole found his parents. They received a ticket as well, my mother-in-law was very good at the job she does, earning her spot on in the New Beginning. Cole was helping them move through their next steps as I tried to keep my kids calm and near me. A soldier had approached me telling me that all kids younger than thirteen needed to get on their bus. All children were deemed worthy. They were a necessity to start a new civilization. I cried as I let them go. Even if I didn't make it, I wanted them to live. I was now alone amongst several yelling and crying strangers. I found my way out the back door of the church where I regrouped with my husband and his parents. He asked where the kids were, telling him what had happened I saw all the color drain from his face. He knew the same thing I did. We may never see them again. A loud booming voice called his last name through a loudspeaker. So not only did Cole but his parents and I, picked up our single 'carry on' we were allowed and walked down the steps. The man in charge pointed to the right for Cole's parents and the left for me and Cole. I held my bag strap on my back holding his hand hard. We got on a bus, I don't remember the bus ride, but we ended up at a high school drop-off, I was crying silently holding thoughts of my kids close to my heart. We had to wait in another line. Getting through this line we sat in bleachers with a lot of other people. This time the man in charge called first names too. Cole was called and my heart sank. He kissed me hard telling me he will always love me and left. I saw him go down and walk up a path to the left, that led through the football field and up to a road where another building waited. A lot of other people were called then it was my turn. I went down to the man in charge, I didn't walk straight to the path like everyone else I stopped to ask a question but before I could open my mouth the man glared at me telling me to keep moving or my ticket would be revoked. I nodded tears still silently streaming down my face. I got up to the building where an older woman was telling people to look through the pictures on the table. I was confused. When I started looking through I noticed they were pictures of children, ages newborn to 10 year olds. I looked for my kids. I cried a little harder when I found a picture of my daughter. She was smiling through tears in her pink and white spotted coat. I took the picture up to the woman. I smiled as I cried telling her this was my daughter and asked her why we were looking at these pictures.

"To pick your family, dear."

That broke me. My heart ached. My son's picture wasn't here! I almost dropped to my knees crying. She told me that we could only choose one child, and must be on our way. I perked up slightly. Maybe just maybe Cole chose my son as if to silently tell me that it will be alright. I held my daughter's picture close to me as I left the building and got on another bus. This bus led me to yet another High school area, where we got our belongings packed into cars. A man dressed head to toe in ballistic gear lead me to a black car. Where my husband was tapping his fingers against the dash in the passenger seat. Once Cole saw me he got out embracing me in a large hug. I have never seen this strong man cry so many tears before. I pushed away from him looking up at him to ask if he picked the boy. He shook his head no. I cried hard into his chest. I may never see my firstborn again. We were yelled at to get back into our car. So he got into the driver seat and I into the passengers. There was an opening in the line ahead of us where we were told to pull into. No words were exchanged between us.

That's when I woke up. I cried as I hugged my kids. I'm about to cuddle my husband now. Why did I have this dream? I woke up twice during the night to pee, and still, my dream 'resumed'. I am terrified of what the future might bring...