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Y/n Pov
My heart raced, my palms are sweaty, and my stomach is doing summer-salts. For such a long time I've had a huge crush on Castiel. He made it so hard not to fall in love with those bright blue eyes. Of course I'd never say anything to him because he most likely doesn't feel the same way but a girl could dream.
Keeping this secret has been hard which is why I'm so happy to have my best friend Dean Winchester. He's always told me just to tell Cas but there's no way because I'm afraid he won't feel the same way. I've been rejected before and yes it hurt but with Cas it'll be different. He means so much to me and it will kill me to know he doesn't love me back.
It's breakfast time right now and we're all in the kitchen eating. Well except Cas because he's an Angel and they don't eat. He's just talking with Sam about the next hunt we're leaving for in two hours. All I can do is stare at him like some sort of creeper. "This anxiety is going to be what kills you." Dean mumbled to me.
I looked over at him and the plate full of bacon in front of him. A smirk formed on my face as I raised an eyebrow at him. "And bacon grease is going to be what kills you."
"I've grown to be okay with that," he winked at me and I playfully rolled my eyes. He gave me a glare as I took a piece of his bacon and ate it. "This is mine," he smiled at me. I chuckled.
"You guys are literally ten." Sam stated. I started to protest but immediately shut up when Cas gave me a small smile. He's got the most perfect smile I've probably ever seen. I've fallen so hard for him that it seems like he doesn't have any flaws. Everything about him in my opinion is perfect, from his head to his toes.
After breakfast we packed to go when there is a soft knock at my door. Turning around I saw Dean standing there looking at me. "Come in," I motioned with my hand before getting back to packing. "Did you finish packing yet?"
Suddenly he grabbed my hands pulling me away from the duffle bag. A frown formed on my face looking at his nervous face. "We should talk," he started and I nodded for him to continue. "Y/n I've been battling with this in my head for too long and I-I can't take it anymore."
"Dean your scaring me," my heart started pounding. He looked me in the eyes and there's a look in his I've never seen before. It's something I can't quite put my finger on.
"I love you," he let out quietly. "I'm...in love with you."
My face started heating up as my heart raced inside my chest. How did I not know he felt this way about me? My words got caught in my throat as I stared at him in complete shock. He looked down before looking back into my eyes. "Please say something." He begged.
"Dean I don't know what to say except, I'm in love with Cas."
"I know...I know that but it's not like I could turn off my heart. Believe me I tried to get rid of these feelings but every single time I did, I'd always come back to you." It's so obvious that this is breaking his heart and it's hurting me to. I wish it didn't have to be this way but I can't help that I've fallen for Castiel.
"Dean," I cupped his cheek in my hand. He closed his eyes to stop himself from completely falling apart. "I'm sorry."
"Me too." He replied once his eyes opened to meet mine.
"Guys we're leaving in ten!" Sam yelled throughout the bunker causing me to pull away from Dean. He gave me a sorry smile before leaving my room. After he left Cas walked in.
"Hey, y/n," he said. "Sam sent me in here to get you and I didn't meant to but I heard your conversation." He told me. Oh god.
"How much?" I ask.
"Enough to know you're in love with me." He said and my heart sank from inside my chest. This day literally couldn't get any worse. Right now I want to crawl into bed and never leave for the next thousand days. "This might not be the right time but if it's any consolation, I'm in love with you too."
"You are?" I frowned confused. He nodded and gave me a small grin.
"We should go," he sighed. "We'll talk more later."
Let's just say the car ride was incredibly awkward and it sucked. There's no way Dean and I can go back to being best friends after this. As for Cas and I, I'm not sure. If we dated it would make me feel guilty. It would make me feel like I'm rubbing our relationship in front of Dean, which is the last thing I want.
My heart felt twisted in two pieces as I stared out the window hoping to find answers soon.
