Rewrite the Stars | 𝐜+𝐜 ✔️

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟒- 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝

Warnings- Self harm

Her.

I opened the door to find Chase lying on his bed tear tracks staining his face. Moving closer my stomach twisted at the tension his face and body, even during sleep, seemed to carry.I reached out my hand and brushed his hair away from his face slowly admiring his face and rubbing my hands threw his hair slowly.  I felt him start to move and I jumped back quickly not wanting to wake him up or scare him. But even in my panic-driven flinch, I noticed something on his arm, something that made my stomach plummet and my mind fog. I gasped aloud, quickly covering my mouth with my hand but it was too late. My audible gasp had woken him up. He quickly sat up, anxiety clear on his face, looking around to see what had made the noise. His eyes met mine and I saw his bewildered expression go to one of sorrow.  

I felt my heart shatter.

 I saw him pull his blanket up over his arms before any words were exchanged and I fought to hold tears back knowing I was part of the reason this was happening.  

  He sighed quietly breaking the eye contact we had been holding for an excruciatingly long and quite minute.  "Charli?" he spoke softly. But it was more of a question than anything. "Chase," I breathed out, not quite sure what to say. What does one say in this situation?  What do you say when your standing in front of your ex, who you just recently had a messy online argument with, who has been through so much. And if that is partially your fault. What do you say then? I didn't know. All I could say in that moment was his name. 

It was a name I had become so familiar with in the past year. A name that brought me so much comfort and safety. It still amazed me, even after everything, how close we had gotten in a short amount time. How we had gone from strangers, to best friends, to lovers so quickly. And furthermore, how the universe always found a way to rip us apart only for us to be brought back together. But through all that, me, standing here, in his room, in the middle of the night, whispering his name. Almost as if it was a plea for him not to leave again. Felt right. "Chase," I spoke again, even softer this time, if that was even possible, looking at his face. His eyebrows were tense, in a way that showed anxiety and pain and my face fell. I sat down next to him and the bed dipped creating a slight creaking noise that was not at all masked as the only sound in the room were our labored breaths and quiet dripping noise of his lava lamp. He moved away quickly, almost as if he was scared of me touching him. Looking up at his eyes once more, I noticed how lifeless they looked and my heart, which was already shattered, shattered more, if that was even possible. 

"Chase, I'm so sorry," I spoke. "I was a moron, I-I let you go, I caused you pain-n." My voice cracked but I would not allow myself to cry, I did not deserve to in this situation. "I know nothing I say will change anything and I resent myself for that, but I need you-u." I spoke softly, and I felt my voice shake and my eyes water no matter how much I tried willing them not to. I felt the bed move slightly and I looked up to see him re-adjusting his position. 

"Charli," he spoke once more. "It's not ok, I'm not ok. But right now, I-I need you. Please," he spoke softly and his voice carried so much pain. All I could do was slowly make my closer to him. When I finally reached him, he laid his head in my lap and I felt my pants getting wet. I realized he was crying. I looked sadly at the boy below me as I felt his breaths becoming more shallow and laboured and his body unsteady and slightly trembling. All I could do was stroke his hair and whisper sweet nothings into his ear until I felt his trembling come to a halt and I realized he was asleep. Even then, I continued to stroke his hair and I shed a few tears of my own reflecting on what was happening. 

He was not ok. I was not ok. Nothing was ok. But it would be. And tonight, we had eachother. And that, that was better than ok. 

A/N 

This chapter took so long for me to figure out what I wanted to do but I'm so happy with it and I hope you guys are too. This chapter is dedicated to Rebecca @Becy100 for motivating me to write and Melia @Localwritermelia for being a great friend and a positive person. Ily both. As always remember to vote and comment 

xx Millie