You lost your appetite during dinner, thinking about what you were going through and the cause of it. You might had an idea with what happened, but you pushed it away to the back of your mind, hoping that you were wrong. Your stomach growled but you could not bring yourself to eat your dinner, and your best friends noticed it as they approached you, grinning at you but worry was clear in their eyes.
"The food on your plate is crying because you're not eating it."
Fred said, making you looked up from your untouched dinner to see the twins sat next to you. Fred sat on your right side, while George took a seat on your left side, frowning as he realised your fatigue expression, and it was so unlike you to look so down in the drains instead of smiling brightly to everyone.
"You look pale and tired, Y/N."
George said, concern was laced through his voice, as he put his hand on your forehead to feel your temperature. You shook your head, trying to give him a convincing smile, but your friends knew you better.
"You look bloody awful. What's wrong?"
Fred interjected, and you laughed at his remark, but your laughter was cut short when you coughed, making your assumption grew even stronger about yourself.
"Y/N, do you want us to take you to Madam Pomfrey?"
"No, I'm alright."
You gave them a small smile, and took a deep breath, feeling your chest tighten as you glanced at Professor Snape who was at the teachers table. It had never happened before. You felt even worse when his eyes met yours, and it was as if air was forced out of your lungs, making you looked away from the professor to compose yourself.
There was something stuck in your throat, it felt like thorns were stabbing your chest and you prayed that your mind was tricking you. Your grandfather's story about the disease was ringing in your head, reminding you of what was happening to you might have something to do with the matter of your heart, your imprudent feelings that were out of your control when you fell for someone that you should not.
It can't be Hanahaki Disease, no, you can't be dying because of an unrequited love...
You quickly stood up, ignoring the twins' questions when you started to leave abruptly, leaving them in total confusion with the way you were behaving. They looked at each other and George shook his head at Fred, knowing that perhaps you needed some time alone.
You did not notice how worried Severus was to see you leave the Great Hall alone, realising how pale and sick you looked like. He was going to follow you to ask you what was wrong when Minerva stopped him, insisting that she wanted to talk about something important. Sighing, he nodded, watching from the corner of his eyes as you walked out of the hall.
- - - -
You had been there a few times before, staring at the mirror with a hopeful heart, the reflection always managed to send butterflies fluttering in your stomach, bringing a genuine smile upon your face as you wished that your heart's deepest desire would someday comes true, no matter how impossible it was.
It was very unwise of you to continue living in the dreams, hanging on to the image of the mirror as you were aware with what you were seeing was not going to become a reality. It was something unacceptable, but you were desperate to cling onto it, thinking that perhaps you had a chance to achieve it and turn your desire into a beautiful reality.
Ironically, now as you stared at the Mirror of Erised, your heart clenched and tears blurred your vision as you knew you were losing yourself because of it. You knew it would never come true, as now your throat was filled with thorns and you could feel life draining out of you as second kept passing through.
Your love was unrequited.
You saw the image on the mirror, the same one as you had seen before, it has never changed. With trembling fingers, you touched the reflection, hoping to see it change and maybe you could undo your feelings to save yourself from the agony but nothing happened.
You should had known better before letting your feelings drown you into a pool of sorrows, and giving your life away just because of your foolish love for somebody who already had his love. Oh, how naive you were, as your heart had never betrayed your love.
The reflection of your deepest desire on the mirror was never changed, as your heart never changed. Your heart was offering undying fidelity to the man, who would never reciprocate your feelings.
Once the first tear broke free, the rest followed in an unbroken stream and you found yourself sobbing on the cold hard floor. It was all too much for you to bear, and it was unfair for you to be punished because of your heart.
Your heart never changed.
And now you were paying the price.
Why were you crying over memories that you would never create with him?
-
now i know perhaps some of you are familiar with hanahaki disease so pardon me if a few things i wrote in my book is different with other books.
anyways thank you for being here! <3
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Petals | Severus Snape
Fanfiction"Perhaps in another life, you would find it in your heart to love me." "In another life." "Yes, and I would always be waiting for you." It was either to die, or to forget him. [severus snape x reader]
