Breathe Again

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Meredith had been coding for 20 minutes. They had recirculated her entire blood volume, with no change.

Owen glanced up to the OR gallery, making eye contact with Derek.  He noticed the tears forming in the trauma surgeons eyes.

"Deluca, run up to the gallery now! Derek shouldn't watch this." He instructed his intern, who turned around and ran out the door.

Moments later he burst into the gallery.

"Doctor Shepherd you shouldn't-" The intern faltered, noticing Derek was smiling.

He directed his attention to the operating table below, where Meredith stats had miraculously improved.

The intern smiled, pressing his forehead against the observation glass as he peered down.

"She's gonna be okay." Derek whispered, more to himself than anyone else. The intern nodded.

"She is." Deluca responded.

•••

Derek ran through the ICU hallway. He sighed as he reached her room. She was surrounded by doctors. They held her her hand, whispered encouragement in her ears, took her pulse, adjusted her vent settings, and make sure she wasn't alone.

"It may take her a while to wake up." Amelia said, looking at her sister with sad eyes.

"Derek, can I speak with you in the hall for a moment?" Arizona asked, leaving Meredith's bedside for the first time in hours.

Derek turned to face her, trying to read the expression on her face.

"Meredith's rape kit came back positive." She stated bluntly. Derek felt physically ill.

"I am gonna kill that bitc-"

"Woah!" Arizona said, placing a calming hand on his shoulder, signaling that he needed to take it down a notch.

"Paul Stadler has been arrested. Right now, Meredith needs you." He nodded, re-entering the room.

"Welcome back, Mer." He whispered, clutching her hand and leaning to give her a kiss.

For the next 12 hours, Derek refused to leave Meredith's side. He sat in a chair near her bed, holding her hand. Meredith's doctors and friends rotated in and out, all of them offering various pieces of encouragement.

"She's gonna be fine, Shep."

"She'll wake up anytime now."

"Hang in there, Derek."

At 4am, Derek raised his head, blinking sleepily. He must have fallen asleep. He looked at the monitors, eyes scanning the numbers.

No change.

He glanced around the room, slowly adjusting to the darkness. Arizona sat across from Derek, asleep with her head on Meredith's bed rail. April and Jackson lay curled on the couch. Bailey, Amelia, Alex, and Maggie laid sprawled in chairs, spread around the room.

Derek sighed, allowing his eyes to fall shut again as he leaned against the chair back.

The next time he awoke, dim sun rays shown through the window. Derek quickly sat up, taking note of the multitude of doctors in the room.

"No change." Maggie muttered, frowning at Meredith's chart.

"Derek, you have a glioma resection in half an hour." Amelia reminded him. Derek shook his head.

"That's tomorrow." He countered, stifling a yawn.

"Tomorrow is today Derek. When's the last time you saw a shower, or a meal?" Amelia asked, concerned.

"I'm fine." Derek sighed, running a finger through his dirty mop of hair.

"Shepherd, you are not fine. You stink, and you look more dead than Meredith here. Go, take a shower, grab a meal, she won't be alone." He nodded, and groaned as he got up from the chair.

•••

Derek pulled a fresh pair of scrubs over his head, and bit the apple enclosed in his hand.

He admittedly felt very refreshed, but he had to get Meredith. He shut his locker door before hearing his pager beep.

Meredith-911

He dropped the apple onto the floor of the attending lounge, and ran.

"What happened?" He yelled out of breath as he entered her room. He stopped suddenly, Bailey was extubating Meredith.

"She's waking up." Arizona said smiling. Derek let out of a cry of relief. He swiftly made his way to her bedside, holding her small hand in his.

"I'll give you two some alone time." Arizona said. As she began to walk away, She felt Meredith squeeze her hand.

"Don't go." She muttered weakly, eyes still closed.

Derek and Arizona glanced up at each other, their faces illuminated with joy.

"Mer, can you do that again? Can you say something for me?" Derek urged, caressing her face softly.

She slowly opened those beautiful green orbs, her forehead scrunching up in pain.

She shuddered at Derek's touch.

"Please.. don't.. touch.. me." She whispered, her eyes glazed with fear and pain.

AHHHHHH don't hate me 😁😁 i have some big plans for this story, it's not over yet.

please keep commenting and voting!!! it really encourages me to keep writing. i'm going to try and push out a bunch of updates this weekend!

hugs and kisses, hope you all are doing well. until next time! 😙

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