apples and scented candles • h.potter ✓

• forty-four •

"Why would I be nervous?" Harry asked, a little too quickly. He tried to smile but realised he probably looked creepy so he stopped trying. "It's not my exam tomorrow. I should be the one to ask you that, Corben."

Corben laughed softly and kissed him. "I'm not nervous. I will be, when I go to bed. But I'm fine now. You're nervous so let's talk about you." He tried to smooth Harry's hair by brushing his fingers through it. Though there was no mirror to look at, Harry could tell it was a futile attempt. "Why are you nervous?"

Harry wanted to deny it. But what would be the point? Corben would insist and anyway, he really was sort of jumpy. So he decided to concede. "I don't know if McGonagall will consider my letter. And if she does, what then? Will I have to go through training? Sit for tests? How do you become a teacher anyway? I have no idea. What if I'm not cut out to be a teacher? My students will hate me because I'll be terrible at it and that's only if I become a teacher, which I'm not even sure I will." He stopped and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. A wave of guilt washed over him.

"Okay, Harry," Corben said with concern, gripping his shoulders. He took him to the sofa and made him sit, then rubbed his arms gently. "Let's do this one at a time."

Harry started to shake his head. "No, let's not. I'm sorry. I'm being selfish. You need to relax and not worry about my problems. You have a big exam tomorrow and -"

"You're not being selfish," Corben said so firmly that it silenced him. "You've been listening to all my problems for months and this is the first time you're telling me yours. I'm the one who has been neglectful. So please let me help you through this."

The words comforted and reassured him but - "I really don't want to burden you."

"You're not. Look, if I talk to you about this it'll keep my mind off my exams so in a way you're helping me too!"

Harry felt like a child as he leaned over Corben and said, "Okay," but he didn't mind it. There was a certain reassurance that came with being looked after, being shown that he was significant and loved, being cared for and pampered, and he did not mind that at all. Corben wrapped him in his arms and spoke.

"Half of the things that you're worried about are a thing for the future. McGonagall will let you know what you need to do, whether you need to go through any training or not, and there really is no need to worry about it now. Once you know the process it will be easier and you can prepare accordingly. And I'm not just saying this to make you feel better but I think you'll be a terrific teacher. I was able to learn so much with you and no hate against Audra but she's very old school. Didn't you also teach a bunch of teenagers when you were fifteen? They all loved you, didn't they? They wouldn't have stuck with you if you were a bad teacher."

Harry was smiling at the end of the speech but thankfully, his face was pressed against Corben's shirt. "They didn't really have a choice," he muttered.

"Modest as always."

Harry smacked him in the stomach.

He pulled back and retrieved the letter from his pocket. He watched it for a moment, reading over the back of the envelope where he had inscribed McGonagall's name and Hogwarts. Then he looked at Corben who seemed to have been watching him thoughtfully. "Shall we go to the Owl Office then?"

A grin broke over his face as Corben stood and pulled Harry along with him.

The Owl Office was dirty, not unlike the Owlery at Hogwarts. To one side were rows of coops covered in straw and bird droppings. Owls of various sizes stood in their respective places, some sleeping, some watching them wearily as Harry and Corben stepped inside. On the other side of the room was a table behind which sat the most tired-looking man Harry had met. His droopy eyes blinked at them and he beckoned them over.

He took a quick glance at the letter that Harry produced before him and laid a gigantic register book on the table where Harry had to sign. He paid a galleon and the man pointed a frail finger at the corner of the room where a tawny owl stood, head under its wing. "Take Umbra. He's good with long distance."

The owl, Umbra, removed his wing and flew toward them as if he knew he was assigned with his next duty. He perched on one of the wooden rods that were wedged into the walls and looked expectantly at Harry. Suddenly reminded of Hedwig, he stroked the owl's head and held out the letter. "Will you take it to Hogwarts for me?"

He heard a choking sound from behind him but he ignored it. The owl took the letter in his beak and took flight.

Once outside the Owl Office Harry halted in his steps and glared at Corben. "Did I say something funny?"

Corben cocked an eyebrow innocently. "What are you talking about?"

"I was trying to be nice with the owl," he said defensively. "Those poor birds have to fly all over the country because wizards can't use phones even in the twenty-first century. You didn't have to snort like that."

"I didn't snort. I was just struck dumb by how adorable you are."

Somehow, Harry felt offended by that. "You're adorable," he snarled, baring his teeth, and felt a deep blush growing on his face as Corben fell over him in laughter. "Stop it."

But Corben seemed to have no intention of stopping.

"I mean it. Stop."

But he was rudely ignored. In the end, Harry turned on his heels and began to walk away on his own. Corben's laughter trailed to a stop as he ran to catch up. Harry did his best not to show his smile.

"I think our apartment is that way," Corben pointed over his shoulder.

"I know."

"So we're not going home?"

"Not yet."

"Okay," Corben said cheerfully and hooked their arms together.

Their shadows rippled on the ground as they walked. The sun was nowhere to be seen and soon, the world would be plunged into darkness, prompting artificial lights to erupt all around them. Neither of them has left the apartment in well over two weeks and Harry could almost hear his lungs thanking him as he breathed in air that wasn't saturated with carbon dioxide.

"It's going to get chilly soon," said Corben. "We should have worn something warmer."

"I'll put a spell on us," Harry assured him.

"Of course you will." Corben poked his cheek. "You're my knight in shining armour. Knight in warm armour. Knight in a jumper."

Harry let out a long sigh. "I knew it wasn't a good idea to let you watch all of those movies."

They entered a park and Corben pulled him to one of the benches. As promised, Harry uttered a spell that kept the cold air from crowding around them. Their arms and shoulders relaxed as a warm cocoon wrapped around their vicinity.

"Thank you for the pep talk," Harry said and took Corben's hands, winding their fingers together. "I'm so glad I found you."

Corben let out a bark of laughter. "That sounds like you picked me up from the roadside and put me in your pocket." He paused, gazing thoughtfully at a tree in the distance and a frown formed on his face. "That's actually not far from what happened."

"Mhm." Harry snuggled up against him. "Are you nervous about tomorrow?"

"A little." He looked at Harry and smiled reassuringly like he was the one who needed reassurance. It annoyed Harry to no end. He should be the one to hold him and comfort him, especially when he was facing such a stressful and pivotal period of his life. Not the other way around. "I'll be fine, Harry."

"I know you will."

Corben folded one leg up on the bench and faced him. Simultaneously, they leaned toward each other until their foreheads touched. Harry closed his eyes, enjoying the presence of his boyfriend next to him, the feel of his skin as their hands lay tangled between them. Corben kissed his mouth briefly and Harry laughed as he said the next words.

"I'm glad you put me in your pocket too."

•••

two more chapters left of this book yeet