"Children Of Sunset" BoyxBoy

Children Of Sunset 7

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I can't hardly sleep...thinking about Colby and how much I missed catching sight of him again. It was like trying to get some rest with a tummy ache...but it was in my heart. In my lungs. Heck, my whole soul felt empty from the very absence of him. I wish I knew what it was about him that has me all turned around the way that I was, but I sure wish that I could get a hold of it somehow.

Tossin' and turnin'...feeling mighty bad...

I could have done with a tiny dose of Colby's smile tonight. Something about seeing his eyes sparkling with the fire light...it brought me peace. Soothing grace. I ain't never been one for falling in love with somebody else...certainly not another fella, pretty to look at or not. But Colby had this...this incredible beauty within him that had a way of breaking me down. All the way down. I almost felt a bit ashamed of myself for letting him kiss me the way he done. Or...did I kiss him first. It's awful hard to remember. I just recall his lips being the softest thing I ever done pressed my own lips against. Slightly damp with a slow movement that enticed me to want more and more contact with him while we was sitting there. He sparked up every naughty part of me with his touch. Heck, with his look alone, to be honest. And I felt almost heartbroken that I didn't get to glide my fingers through that soft hair of his tonight. Something about not having him close to me made me feel...well...I don't know. Just all lopsided and hungry for something I probably ain't got no right to ask for.

I never understood what would make a man give his sweetheart a handful of flowers before. But now...if I could get my hands on some...I feel like I'd want to pass some on to Colby. Just to let him know that I like how he makes me feel inside. Maybe even make him feel the same way for a little while.

I wonder if this is what my daddy used to talk about all the time when it came to courting my mama back when they was young. They always sounded like tall tales to me when I was little. Stories...like we used to learn about at the schoolhouse. But...that kind of feeling is real, ain't it? I feel it now. And I find myself craving more. So much more.

So much that I can't even find a way to drift off to sleep.

I even got up a few times to keep checking the window to see if maybe Colby might be sitting out there...lookin' pretty...waiting on me. But it was too dark to see much of nothin', anyway. I just...I hope that wherever he is, he's looking up at the night sky, and the moon...and he's just as turned over about this as I am.

It would make me feel better to know that he was thinking about me too. I reckon, there ain't nothing more lonesome than feeling this way all by myself.

I don't remember when I was finally able to close my eyes, but the burn of the morning light seem to come right at me with a single blink. Not that I wasn't still tired from a lack of rest last night. Daddy got up to make us a quick breakfast, but Uncle Buster slept in way past the morning light, and just before my daddy left the house, he told me to finish off them chicken's eggs before they got good and cold. I figured Buster would probably eat them any way, but we ain't got no food to waste, so he's gonna have to scavenge the cupboards for something else to fill his belly this morning, I reckon.

More his problem than mine.

It still ain't quite like Mama's breakfast...but it's clear my daddy had picked up a couple of tricks from the taste of it.