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Hey,
Why does everything feel... strange? Why am I being this anxious? I can't stop zoning out all day. I feel sick but I'm not. I can't keep my mind from what I should focus on because I keep on repeating that moment again and again.
I wanted to run. I wanted to shout. I wanted to go nearer because my insides are screaming at me to do so but I can't. It's like my feet are glued on the ground; preventing me to do what I should and want to do, stuck just looking at you.
Rosie, I wished that I've noticed you sooner before and until now. I blame myself for not knowing you sooner. For not being able to be at least a tiny bit reason for you to stay. But I never know I would have something more to regret today. I regretted that seven seconds of my life. I regretted not doing something when I could: I regretted not calling for your name, hold you and ask you to stay.
Because the moment I saw you in the middle of one of the boulevard in Gimhae as the sun's bidding its goodbye, your now blonde hair flawlessly grazing your delicate skin while your flowy, pink skirt sways every step you take as you walk further, I saw myself statued at where I was. Stupidly watching you drift away, again.
You're in Gimhae. A freaking hour away from Busan. A freaking hour away from here, an hour away from me. I didn't know until now and I almost wouldn't if it weren't for the project I almost declined. How come I didn't try to find you hard enough? How come?
I wanted to fucking punch myself. After a year, Rosie, I saw you. My insides churn as I recall it over and over again and end up being disappointed with myself. I have all the chance at that moment, and I blew it away without even realizing it.
And as I was writing right now... I realized what matters. I wasn't able to talk to you but I sure did see your calm smile. That makes me breathe comfortably. Knowing that you're wearing it stunningly.
I want you to keep that smile. I will find you and when I do, I won't waste anymore seconds of my life. I just want you home. I want you home with me because I'm longing for you dearly.
Love, Jimin
— a/n: a freaking update because rosé's on the ground had me on my knees. bruh, it was magical. her voice, visual and the MV is everything! three years of waiting is worth it. freaking worth it! let's go stream. :>>>
