Mistakenly Human (Poetry)

Keeping Quiet

That look of disappointment

Edged into his face

Saying you’re a disgrace

That look of failure in his eyes

How many times do I have to try?

It seems everything I do

He takes a different view

Feeling stressed

Keeping my words suppressed

I try and try

All I ever want to do is make him proud

But I’m always stuck in a cloud

Why can’t he just understand

That I need a helping hand

Taking my things won’t make me try

Instead it makes it seem pointless

Making me feel hopeless

I try, but get discouraged

And I slowly just stop trying

And start lying,

I know that seems confusing

But in this world I am losing

I get into this mood

And no its not because of friends

Just sometimes I feel like there is no end

I feel sad for no reason

And it takes me away

I stop trying

I start feeling hopeless

Like I don’t deserve anything

I feel like I shouldn’t be here

I always have some sort of fear

And it’s so hard

Just to talk to someone

And they can’t understand

Nothing goes as planned

I keep all my emotions in

I feel like all I do is sin

I fake a smile

And it stays like that for a while

I start to slack

My mind feels black

And it gets really hard to stay intact

My heart breaks for no reason

Nothing caused it, no treason

I feel like I deserve to be punished

I feel like I should be finished

I know I should try

But it’s hard when all I do is cry

It’s hard to let my feelings out

It really makes me feel nothing but doubt

No, I really do put effort

But sometimes it gets hard

Feeling like a failure

Leaving my thoughts to be sour

Going 80 miles per hour

But I do understand why he’s frustrated

I know I make things seem complicated

I know I should try more

Instead of being done for