Ghost of Us

prologue

I suggest to listen to this song while reading.

The funeral we held for Loki was quiet, as rain beat down on the black umbrellas we all held in our clneched hands, our shoes practically sinking into the mud.

The casket for Loki was empty of course, but Mayor Briggs and Luke wanted him to have a headstone, something we could all come back to when we needed to. And there was a huge part of me that was grateful that it was a decision they had made.

Aria held onto Luke, crying as the Priest read out what he needed to. I barely heard anything as my father hugged me to his side, the promise ring that Loki had given me still sat on my finger. Untouched.

I felt nothing as I stared at the wooden casket. I didn't know what to feel. Sad. Broken. Remorse. Anger. Guilt. Pain. It all filled me to the point where I felt nothing at all.

Students who had barely known Loki, still had shown up to his funeral, sad looks on their faces but those who knew him most, stood in the front.

Loki had no blood family, the only one he had had died in a fire and now he had no one to say goodbye to him. Only Luke, Mayor Briggs, Aria, Makayla and myself.

Makayla was in tears, clutching her Father's hand like a scared little girl. She had barely known Loki, but he was still a brother to her.

The moment came for Aria to step forward and place a red rose on the casket. The rain battered the petals, a reminder that even in death, rain would fall.

It reminded me of a time when Loki had told me that he loved the rain, that with rain it brought new beginnings.

Luke was next, placing not only a rose but a photograph of them in their backyard, throwing a ball. He stepped back as Makayla stepped forward and placed a rose for herself and Mayor Briggs. Then, it was my turn but my fingers shook as I stepped forward.

The thorns on the roses pricked my finger but I felt no pain as I walked forward, unsure what to say, what to do.

My shoes sunk into the mud, almost clutching me to the point I couldn't move forward. Maybe, it didn't want me to. I reached the casket and the rain soaked my black hair and black dress, as I stood there for a moment.

It took me a minute to wrap my head around this, to realise I was in front of an empty casket meant to hold the body of the love of my life.

"I love you." I whispered.

I knew he wouldn't hear me.

He wasn't around anymore. Travelled to the other side, to be with his mother, the friends he'd lost during the wall. To be with Vanessa.

I placed four roses on his casket, one for each significant moment we had shared. The moment we met, the first time he told me he loved me, the moment when he was allowed to be human and the moment he had asked me to marry him.

The rain made me shiver, the cold water running down my back as the sky darkened. I tilted my head up and closed my eyes, breathing in the scent of rain. I could see what Loki meant. The rain was beautiful, a simple reminder that you were alive.

A hand touched my own and I turned to see that Luke had joined me.

They began to lower the casket and classmates began to leave.

Aria moved to my other side, leaning her head on my shoulder as we watched the empty casket lower into the earth.

"It's okay, Reena." Luke said softly.

I tilted my head.

"Where ever he is. I know he's watching out for you."

Tears sprung to my eyes but they blended into the rain that ran down my cheeks.

"I miss him." Aria said softly.

I began to cry then, sobbing as the dirt began to fill the grave.

Both Aria and Luke hugged me, holding me as I leant on them for support. My heart ached, my stomach hurt and my brain was fuzzy.

My eyes blurred with tears as I lifted my head and I swear I saw Loki standing beside a gravestone. My eyes widened and he smiled.

I blinked and he was gone.

Aria held me, as I buried my head into her chest. I could tell she was barely holding it together herself and I knew Luke wasn't.

"Come. Let's make sure you don't get a cold." Aria said softly as she took my shoulders and began to lead me away.

I followed, almost robotically.

I had lost him.

He was gone.

My Loki Peakes was truly gone and he wasn't coming back. Ever.

The rain continued to beat down on us as we walked back to the cars, my father opening the door to his car and Aria helping me in before following.

Luke hopped into the passenger side as my Father closed the door.

"He's gone, isn't he?" I whispered as my Father walked around the car.

The silence was enough of an answer, only for it to break as my Father got into the car and turned it on.

Aria pulled me to her side and I rested my head on her shoulder as we pulled away from the cemetery.

Leaving Loki Peakes's empty casket to be the constant reminder that I had lost my only love.

5 Years Later