Nostalgia || Namkook

13. Abort Mission

"Do you ever wonder what he must be doing right now?", Taehyung asks, absentmindedly playing with his hair. Namjoon shrugs. "Honestly? Yeah. I think he must be making music professionally or maybe he decided to keep pursuing his degree in fashion? Who knows", he sighs heavily.

"You know baby, sometimes I wonder what could've been had he denied my accusations that day. You, me, him, your brother. We would have been together still. Probably a lot happier than we are now", he adds.

"Not true, dad. I'm happy with just you", Taehyung argues, snuggling in close to Namjoon. Said man smiles happily, once again overwhelmed with the thought that he's so lucky to have Taehyung in his life. His baby never fails to make him feel like the luckiest man alive. _______________________________________

"Just deny it, Jungkook. I'll believe you. We can just forget about this. You just have to say it", Namjoon says--- no, begs. Jungkook just hangs his head low, guilty. He has to do this. For Namjoon.

"Jungkook", Namjoon breathes out, lower lip quivering. Jungkook shuts his eyes close. He doesn't want to cry. He's not a hypocrite.

"I'm sorry", he says instead, so soft that Namjoon almost misses it. Almost. Suddenly, Jungkook feels his left cheek burn. Reflexively, his hand comes to rest on it as he slowly raises his head.

He watches with wide eyes as Namjoon breathes heavily, cheeks covered in tears, eyes red and sad, so sad. He looks down at Namjoon's hand, his palm getting pink. That's when he realizes.

Namjoon has slapped him.

All these years of being together, Namjoon hasn't once thought about hurting him physically. Jungkook knows he deserves it, though.

"I hate you! I hate you, Jeon Jungkook!"
________________________________________

"Are you sure?", Jimin asks tentatively. Taehyung sighs, nodding his head. "Yeah, it's better this way. Your Appa cheated on my dad, Jimin. I don't want him to hurt my dad even more", he says, feeling a wave of anger rush through him.

Jimin opens his mouth to protest, offended, before closing it again. He feels angry that Taehyung gets to accuse Jungkook of something he hasn't done but at the same time, he knows it's not his fault. Jungkook did this to himself. Maybe it's really better this way.

"But they still love each other", Jimin finds himself saying despite everything that just went through his mind. Taehyung turns to look at him with a sad, almost wistful smile. "Love is not enough sometimes, Jimin. Let's just stop all this. Let's stop trying to get them back together", he says.

Jimin nods silently, swallowing the lump in his throat. He almost wishes that Jungkook didn't tell him the truth. Almost. Because he knows he would've been disgusted with his Appa had he not decided to come clean to him. He's glad he did. Jimin wouldn't have been able to live like that.

"Besides, I think my dad is seeing someone".

Taehyung's voice snaps him out of his thoughts. "What?", he whispers cautiously. Taehyung smiles at him. It doesn't reach his eyes. He looks unhappy. Guilty?

"I saw him cuddling with a man this morning", he says softly. Jimin frowns. "Could've been his friend", he offers. Taehyung shakes his head. "Dad is not a touchy person. He never even cuddles with his best friend", he says.

And Jimin knows what that means. "And you're not happy about it", he says easily. Taehyung looks at him, shocked. "How did you...?'', he trails off. Jimin shrugs. "I'm your brother, Tae", he says simply. There's no need for an explanation.

"I'm just.... I don't know. I want dad to be happy but I don't know if I'll be able to accept his partner as my father", Taehyung voices out, so softly that Jimin's heart breaks. He's painfully aware of that feeling.

"You don't have to", he says. Taehyung looks at him like he's crazy. "If he's gonna be in my dad's life, I have to accept him", he states. Jimin nods seriously. "I mean you have to accept him as his partner but you don't have to call him your dad if you don't want to", he speaks softly.

Taehyung's lips part in surprise and something akin to understanding. "I guess you're right", he sighs, looking at the sea behind their bench. "What if dad wants me to accept him as my other dad, though?", he asks after a minute or so.

"Then you tell him what you feel", Jimin says simply. "He won't force you. You both deserve to be happy". Taehyung nods and they sit in silence for a while, letting the cool sea breeze wash through them and refresh their minds.

"What about us, Tae?", Jimin asks suddenly, startling Taehyung. "What do you mean?", he asks. "You know what I mean", Jimin replies, voice tightening with each word. Taehyung goes to argue before a sudden realization hits him. He does know what Jimin means.

"Let's not...", he breathes deeply. "Let's not meet each other ever again", he says slowly, like he's afraid to break Jimin's heart, like he's afraid his brother will lash out. Except, that's not what happens. Absolutely not. Jimin merely nods like it doesn't bother him one bit, like he has been expecting that to happen.

"Alright", is the only thing that leaves Jimin's mouth and Taehyung has a sudden urge to clear things out. He crouches down before Jimin's legs and holds both of his hands. "I love you, Jiminie. I hope you know that. I just can't see you again because it hurts. It hurts a lot. I don't want to leave with the 'what could've been's. Please let me be selfish this once", he cries, tears littering his soft cheeks.

Jimin pulls him up and hugs him tightly. "I understand, Taehyungie. Don't cry. I love you, too", he starts sobbing despite his own words. "I should go now", he says just as quickly, roughly wiping his tears even when more keep flowing.

When he turns to leave, Taehyung's hand on his wrist halts him.

"Come to my recital. Just this once. Please?"

♥♡♥

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