Illicit Affairs

thirteen. how ironic

After a few more days pass, Aria returns to her old habits. Specifically, her nightly habits.

I learn that she's returned to that state of her life when I arrive to my room late at night after hanging out with Spencer. He had been telling me about how his second date with Ivy had gone, and like a good friend, I stayed for all of his random speeches about how much he likes her. Unfortunately, it meant that Aria hadn't given me any warning of anything.

So, I was pleasantly surprised when I walked into my room to find her making out with some random guy.

And by pleasantly surprised, I mean enraged at what I was seeing.

I yell at Aria and tell her to get her own fucking room instead of making me witness this. She's shocked to see me, but quickly tells me that I need to stop being so fucking dramatic.

The guy she's with, with plain brown eyes and dark blonde hair, just sits there like an idiotic squirrel standing on the road waiting to get run over. He just looks at us as if we're too terrifying to even talk to.

"Either get the fuck out or tell him to leave," I tell her.

"What? Are you my mom or something? Grow up. Why don't you leave?"

She's extremely angry, and the rage is present in her green eyes. I take note of her disheleved appearance, and find myself annoyed that she's with some guy.

She's still extremely beautiful in this dark light though, and I wonder what it would be like to be with her. It's not like I'm jealous though. I'm not. I'm just annoyed that I came here to sleep and instead she's planning to be with a random person.

"You have two options. Leave or tell him to leave," I repeat.

The guy sits there silently, not daring to even say something out loud. Aria looks at me like she wants to murder me, and her intense stare pierces through me. I feel the tension between us, and I don't back down. I stand tall and firm, watching as to what she plans to do next.

"Fine," she says.

"Fine what?"

"Steven, leave," she tells him.

I feel satisfied with myself, and relieved that I won't have to deal with anymore problems tonight.

For the first time, the idiot speaks, saying, "What? You're going to let your roommate tell you what to do?"

"Yes, I am. Now get out!" She yells at him.

He mutters a bunch of insults under his breath but hesitantly gets up, practically stomping past me. I don't care about his rude stance and ugly face, so I put on my sweetest smile which only makes him angrier. He shuts the door loudly behind him, and I let out a laugh at the thought of this random person losing her.

And it's not because I would rather be with Aria myself. No, it's definitely not because of that.

When we're forced to look back at each other, I'm unable to come up with anything to say to her. Her lips are pursed, and she seems to be lost in thoughts too. Her revealing black shirt is more than enough to catch my attention.

Oh fuck.

It hits me like a sudden thousand bricks. I like her.

I've been trying to deny it with everything I do and say, but it's true. I like her and her ridiculous attitude and her sarcasm and horrible sense of humor and beautiful smile and gorgeous eyes and everything. I like her even though she annoys me senselessly and leaves me feeling like a fool.

All I can do is try to control my facial expression as my mind is running wild.

"Why did you do that?" She asks, interrupting my thoughts.

"Because I want to be alone tonight," I choose to respond.

"Alone? Yet you wanted only him to leave. So, what? You wanted to be alone with me?" She asks harshly.

It seems like there's another meaning behind her words, something unspeakable.

"I gave you a choice, " I tell her right away.

I can't let her believe that what she's suggesting is true. I can't let her tell me if she feels anything toward me. I can't allow anything more than what we currently have right now to happen.

It's not like she likes me. She never would. It's impossible.

"And I could tell that you were wishing that I would tell him to leave. So what now? I did what you told me to do. What do you want now?"

Inside of my mind, I'm going through a thousand possible scenarious in the span of five seconds. I don't know what to say. I wonder if I should lie to protect myself, or tell her the truth. I question what telling her the truth would mean. What do my feelings mean?

It's not like she's denied anything. If she did what I wanted, then she wanted that too. She wanted to be alone with me.

She wants to be alone with me.

Instead of chasing for the fire in my heart, I mumble, "nothing. I don't want anything from you."

Wordlessly, I walk out of that room and leave her mouth hanging wide open. I can't allow anything to happen. It's certainly ironic.

I kept telling her or that guy to leave, and instead, I'm the one that's leaving again.

How completely and utterly ironic.

Sorry for the late update!