A Girl Like Her

Chapter 16.

Song: Broken by Lund

"Life is the art of dying" ~ Unknown

Not Edited

I sat in my car in the driveway. Unmoving. My muscles were already becoming stiff, sore from today's use. My knuckles began to bruise very slightly and even my legs felt like jelly. I was not excited about facing my parents. It felt like all those years ago, fearing getting caught by them. But I really didn't do anything wrong. In fact, they should be proud. I was exercising, wasn't I? That was healthy, wasn't it?

I snorted to myself. Who am I kidding? As if my parents would care. I missed an important dinner when my mother gave me direct instructions to behave and be on time.

At the thought of my mother, I sucked in a breath. Today had been so emotionally draining all I wanted to do was go inside and crash in my bed. Nightmares be damned, I was exhausted.

Finally, with a defeated sigh, I made my way to the front of my house.

Here goes nothing.

As I cracked open the front of the door, I couldn't hear a thing. I glanced to my left, looking for the cars in the driveway. Mom and dad's cars were parked side by side, no trace of the earlier guests' there.

I had missed the entire dinner, it seems. I could only imagine what their reaction would be. I cringed, tugging at my bottom lip suddenly. I'd done so good these past few years. I didn't step out of line. I didn't come home late. I kept my grades up. I didn't party or drink. What was one lousy missed dinner?

God. I shook my head at my thoughts. I was never scared of my parents' reaction towards me. It wouldn't change anything, why should I start caring now?

As if I had made up my mind, I carefully closed the front door. I stood frozen, listening for any movement. It wasn't that late so I wasn't expecting them to be in bed just yet. But I haven't seen dad in who knows how long. Maybe he went directly to bed after dinner?

I checked the kitchen. The smell of leftover food could still be detected. Mom must've just put away the food not long ago. There were no signs of them, so I assumed they must be upstairs in bed already. The thought made me hesitate to climb the stairs.

I gripped the edge of the staircase railing, my foot hovering over the first step. At last second, I pulled back from the staircase. If mom and dad were uptairts, I'd wait a little longer. I didn't want another chance encounter with mom's shockingly brutal grasp.

Instead, I found myself moving through the living room. My gaze drifting through the happy family pictures. They were all taken in my elementary and early middle school years. Before the bitter world changed me into someone else entirely. I stared at the sweet smile plastered on mom's face in one of them. Her arm was tightly wound around my shoulder, her blue eyes shining with happiness as dad posed next to her. His own smile more real and less intimidating than usual.

And then there was me. All dressed in a deep shade of purple with gorgeous sparkles running down the length. My hair twisted into an immaculate bun on top of my head. My eyes shining with the same love and radiance as the one in my mother's eyes. It was the last father daughter dance I ever went too. The last moment I can remember where my family was whole and we were all so happy. We each completed one another. There was no need for extended fighting or prolonged arguments because we were a family.

My smile was broken. I can't even remember what happened that night. I can't remember if I enjoyed those last memories with him or not.

The smile I had staring at the picture turned into a small frown.