So young

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Beth's dead. You could've saved her. You knew she lied. You knew she couldn't protect her. You're the reason she's dead. Everyone's going to hate you. It should've been you.

Unfortunately daryls bike wasn't loud enough to drown out the battle going on in my head. It was my fault Beth was dead. What would Maggie and Herschel think? I promised to protect her. What will Carl, my twins think! It'll destroy them. I gripped harder onto daryl and buried my head into his back trying so hard to concentrate on the hums of the bike instead. Suddenly I began shaking and I just wanted to scream. I couldn't go back. I could,dnt face them.

"Daryl stop!" I yelled over the motor.

"What!" He yelled back.

"Daryl stop the bike!" I cried.

"We're almost back. We can stop then!" He yelled.

"No daryl now! If you don't I'll jump!" I yelled.

He growled, but eventually pulled over and brought the bike to a stop. I quickly swung my leg off and got off as daryl looked at me like I was crazy,

"What the hell woman! Get back on!"

I wrapped my arms around myself suddenly feeling cold,

"No go back without me."

He growled and got off his bike storming up to me,

"What the fuck woman!"

"Daryl don't please, just go" my voice cracked as tears started to fall.

"No I ain't leavin you here. What is this all about? This about what happened to Beth?" He asked.

"Daryl please" I begged.

"You're blAmin yerself ain't ya!" He growled grabbing my arm.

"Daryl!" I begged.

"No you know it ain't yer fault!" He yelled.

I finally broke down and pushed him away. He looked at me shocked as I started breathing heavily and tears flew down my face. I clenched my fists at my sides,

"It is my fault! I knew she lied that Herschel knew she came! I promised she'd be fine and she would've if you would've let me distract em!" I screamed.

"If I would've let ya run into that herd, you would've died! Doing be stupid! You know that!" He yelled.

"Better me then her!" I yelled.

He stormed up and got in my face,"you don't mean that"

I pushed him away crying harder,"yes I do! She was so young daryl! How do you expect me to go back there and tell Maggie or Herschel! How am I going to face Carl or the twins or Judith!"

I was fully screaming as I started shaking and my throat began to clench up. I was suddenly gasping for air. I sank to my knees and tried to control my breathing when I heard daryl storm up to me and bend down to my height. He placed an arm on my back and held something out infront of me. My vision was blurry, but I saw the small object in his hands. My inhaler. I took it from him and used it which helped tremendously. When I finally got my breathing under control, I looked up at him,

"How do you still have this? I left it at the farm"

"Grabbed it before the herd took it down. Keep it with me all the time just in case" he grunted.

I smiled as he wiped a tear on my cheek. He stood back up and stuck his hand out to help me up. I grabbed it and he pulled me up immediately bringing me into a hug. I clung onto him as if for dear life.

"We're gonna be ok" he whispered.

I pulled away and smiled lightly at him as he nodded with his head,"c'mon let's go."

I nodded and we made our way back to the camp.

The next day daryls pov

Once we arrived back and the news was broken about Beth, the atmosphere changed. Everyone was broken. She may not have done much but she was way too damn young. Herschel and Maggie are a mess. So are the kids. We had decided to stay overnight one last time so we could do a service. Kayla didn't attend. She locked herself up in our room the moment she got back. She hasn't talked to anyone. Including the twins. I didn't know what to do. Something's you just can't fix. After the service I grabbed my crossbow and told the twins to stay with Carl as I made my way over to Maggie who was by Glenn and her dad. She saw me coming and wiped a few tears. We made eye contact and I nodded my head for her to come here. She nodded and gave Glenn's hand a squeeze and walked over to me. She wrapped her arms around herself and sighed.

"I'm sorry bout Beth" I whispered.

"Thanks" she whispered back.

"I'm bout to go huntin, could ya do somethin for me?" I asked.

"Sure" she said.

"Kayla's been locked up in our room since yesterday. Ain't sayin a single word. She blames er self fer what happened to Beth. Anyway you could talk to er? She won't listen to me." I said.

"Of course" she said and walked past me up to the house.

I watched her and sighed. I started off towards the woods hoping to return to the kayla I know and that things wouldn't turn out worse.

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