The Marriage Deal.

Take Thirty-Four.

"My baby's fit like a daydream, walking with his head down. I'm the one he's walking to.." - T.S

34|

It was the first time in a while Derick slept downstairs. I didn't know how to feel about it, but I definitely understood and respected his decision. There was nothing I could do about it either way. He was in no way, shape or form supporting my decision to abort this baby. On one note, that fact made my heart race and on another, it terrified me. This entire time, I already built the narrative inside of my head that Derick wouldn't want this child, and after telling him, I would only need to schedule a doctor's appointment for the abortion. Now, after actually having the conversation and knowing for sure that he, in fact, wanted this child, I was stuck.

He was right about everything he accused me of. I was jealous of him still being affected by Victoria, apart of me did know that there was a chance he'd want me to have this child, I did cling to this controlling, uptight and bitter nature that I had going on basically since I was a teenager and over all, I was absolutely terrified.

I was laid up in bed, rubbing slowly and comfortingly at my stomach, staring at the ceiling. These past few days, I've been in this position so many times, I lost count. I sought after comfort from the very same source that I intended to terminate. Suddenly, I felt guilty and my hand stilled and dropped to my side.

There was one person for sure, no matter what, that brought me comfort every time without fail: my mother. I grabbed my phone off of the bedside table and unlocked it, going into my messages to find her name. Once I did, I shot her a message asking if she was at home. I didn't have to wait a long time for a response and the moment she confirmed being home, I got up and headed to the bathroom to shower. I was going to see her.

• • • • • • • • •

After knocking on the front door of my parents' house, I expected to have to wait a little, since I did not notify them that I'd be coming. Luckily, the wait wasn't long at all. My mother answered and she looked pleasantly surprised.

"Darling, you're here!" She stated the obvious, her eyes twinkling with sheer joy.

My spirits were rising already, just by being in her presence. I stepped into her outstretched arms and settled into her embrace, eagerly accepting the comfort that came along with it.

"I cannot tell you how much I needed this hug." I admitted, shocked at how close to tears I actually was.

She gave me one last meaningful squeeze and then pulled back. "I knew something was wrong the second I opened the door. Come in, my love. We've got some talking to do." She stepped aside as she invited me in. I sighed and entered the house. The homey feeling I got anytime I stepped in here made me miss my own abode.

We headed straight to the living room and I sunk down onto the sofa with a sigh.

"Okay, talk to me." She urged, motioning her hand.

I took ahold of that same hand and looked at her. "Not yet. Tell me about you and dad first. How are you two? How was that special date you two had planned?" I needed something positive in my space, in my air.

She smiled tenderly. "Oh, London.. every time I think it's impossible to love your father more, I'm proven incorrect." She shook her head, seemingly still in disbelief with how much she loves my father. This automatically made both my heart and lips smile. "We had such a beautiful time on our date. He took me to the place where we first met. It was a restaurant, called Tasty Tim's then. Now, it's a flower store. When we got there, your father had already preordered a bouquet of flowers for me. Then, we spent the rest of the day pretending that we were still young and newly in love. When we got home, I'd told him that the pretending wasn't needed, because nothing can top our love now."