"I'm definitely not used to this at all. Not yet." Calum smiled, watching as Luke leaned over to give me a kiss, which I had refused multiple times, but finally gave in. It had been a few months since Luke and I had been officially ruled as a couple.
Not much had changed, except for the fact that, Luke, was the odd man out of the band. The only one who was taken. Luke and I went out regularly, when he wasn't consumed with work from the band.
That may be one thing that had changed a bit, but not all that much. 5 Seconds of Summer became more known as time passed and I was so happy for them to be living out their dream. But I couldn't help but be afraid of losing Luke, as well as my three best friends.
THe thoughts overwhelmed my mind, shoving themselves into my thought process. I couldn't lose him. Not when Luke and I had become more.
I admit, I was happy, but I was scared. They'll leave me. And then I'd be alone again.
I couldn't take that, it would be like ripping my heart out. But that's what love is all about, right? Being happy for someone you love, because they're happy.
I smiled as I watched Luke from the distance. He got along so well with the boys, and if they had the oppurtunity to leave, I'd be the only thing holding them back, really, I'd be holding Luke back.
Calum would say, where the band is, home is. So, really, they would all agree as a group, and I couldn't be one little rock in the way of their success. Everyone knew they had potential. I knew it from the moment I met them.
I knew Luke loved me, he said it everyday. And I loved him too.
Luke would tell me that nothing will change. That he'd always be here, never leaving me. But we knew what would happen when the day comes.
I sat on the couch, my knees curled up to my chest. My chin rested on my knees as I continued in thought.
Luke sprawled out next to me, fiddling with my fingers as he pulled me close to him.
"What are you thinking about." He said, his eyes observing my face. I kept quiet, the thoughts haunting me. I didn't want to be alone. I didn't want to get left behind.
"Nothing."
"Come on, Mase. I know something is up." He said, his eyes focused on mine. I avoided eye contact all together, but Luke and his pale blue eyes made it hard not to look. When I finally did, he sat up against the back of the couch, pulling my legs over his lap. His arms wrapped around me, laying his head on my shoulder.
"You know, you can tell me anything, right?" He reassured, his hand passing over my thigh soothingly. I nodded as Luke played with my fingers again.
"I'm probably just tired."
"Do you want me to take you home?" He offered, pulling away so that he was able to look at me. I honestly didn't want to leave Luke, but I needed time to clear my head before I said anything with my stupid mouth. God know, that's worked well for me before.
Last time, that resulted in Luke shouting at me.
"Sure."
Luke stepped out for a few, leaving the boys at his house. It took no time to drop me off, and he'd be back with them.
As we stepped out of the car, he walked me over to my apartment room. I stopped in my spot to turn as his hand held my arm.
"Are you sure your okay?" Luke persisted, his eyebrows scrunching in the middle with concern. He noticed my change in attitude, which had gone from seemingly exhausted to silent, though I had thought nothing of Luke noticing.
"What? Y- yeah. I should get inside." I said, placing a quick peck on his cheek before stepping inside. I knew Luke was still standing there, astonished and dumbfounded. I could picture it, though the door was already closed. I waited until his footsteps faded before I could feel myself breathe at a normal pace.
I know Luke was thinking about this as well. But he was the kind of person that didn't let anything affect him until it was there right in front of him, like a matter at hand.
I, however, was completely different. When thoughts came to me like this, they would eat me alive until it ruined things.
I sighed, tossing my bag to the floor as I made my way to the fridge. Remembering that it contained just about nothing in my range of edible, I skipped dinner for the night, still satisfied from the lunch I'd had earlier with the boys.
My mood had drastically changed from that time of the day. I hand't really though about any of this until they had band practice at Luke's, which I accepted their invite to yet again.
No doubt, I absolutely loved their band practices.
But today was the first time I realized that once they became big, there was no going back. I ran my hand over my face, consumed with all the thoughts and gave in.
As I freshened up for bed, my phone buzzed on the night stand.
*I hope you are feeling better tomorrow. Have a goodnight's sleep. xx*
I read over Luke's text a few times, before curling up into the white confines of my bed. Even when Luke wasn't here, I could still smell his cologne, embedded into my sheets.
✩✩✩✩
Work this morning was a drag. I didn't bother to answer to the many calls and texts I'd gotten from Luke. I was too busy anyway, to answer to him at the moment.
I was taken into a board room today, as we were called in early for a meeting.
"What's this about?" I asked Darcy. She was about to speak when the Doctor, who was also th manager of the office, began to speak.
"As we all know, we have one employee who will be departing from our presence here at the office. We've all grown to love her for over six years, but she has found it's time to get out of here. Darcy, I'm sure you have something to say before we announce who will be taking your place as receptionist."
"I don't have much to say except how you guys have become like my family. Even if all this was work. And Iim sure, the girl who is taking my place next in line will be great for it." She smiled, wiping a tear from her eye. The middle-aged woman wrapped her arms around me before hugging a few others who she'd gotten so close to as an employee here.
As everyone piled out of the room, Doctor Lesleigh called me over.
"I know you are a great employee, you have been so far," She smiled, "What do you think about taking her place as receptionist? You're really the only one qualified, seeing as this is a small darn office. I have another person taking your place anyway, so it works out." She joked.
"Oh, sure. Yeah, Thank you." I said, shaking her hand. She waved before walking back to her main corridor and into her office.
I began taking my smal box of things and placing them into the desk up front. I sat in the chair, taking a breath before getting up.
She let me off my shift and that's when I headed out for tonight. As soon as I left the main entrance, sure enough, Luke's car was parked, as heleaned against it.
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