She wanted to throw a fit. Gusto niyang sugurin ito at sampal-sampalin. How dare he? Pinaghirapan niyang lutuin yung pagkain tapos sa basurahan lang nito iyon ilalagay? But she kept her cool kahit parang sasabog na siya sa sobrang galit.
That's what he was hoping for. He was waiting for her to break down and cry or to get angry. Neither will happen.
She took the trash out saka niya isa-isang kinuha mula roon ang shanghai rolls na tinapon nito.
"What the hell are you doing?"
"What does it look like I'm doing?" she asked blandly. Good thing matibay ang sikmura niya. Mabuti na rin na puro pinagbalatan lang ng gulay at ilang plastic ang laman ng basurahan. Nilagay niya sa isang maruming pinggan ang mga shanghai rolls.
"Are you going to eat those?" he asked in amusement.
"Do you want me to eat them? Will that make you happy?"
He simply shrugged. "If you want to, then feel free."
Pagkasabi ay umalis na si Ken para kumain sa labas. She wanted to taste the food just to see if he's lying o kung wala talagang lasa ang niluto niya, but she eventually shook her head. It doesn't matter anyway.
Ibinigay na lang niya iyon sa aso ng kapitbahay.
--
He woke up feeling guilty and that guilt is still eating him up. Walang gana si Ken na kumain kaya tumigil na lang siya sa isang kapehan. He ordered a cup of coffee and pondered at what he did to her earlier. He knew it was wrong, pero sa tuwing kaharap niya si Ahn, inuunahan ang logic niya ng galit.
When he took a bite of that roll, he was brought back to high school. Noong panahon ipinagluto siya nito kapalit ng niluto niyang spaghetti. Yun yung panahon na hindi pa nya sinasabi ritong gusto nya ito. The memory was too much for him to bear. When his eye caught the trash bin in one corner, he automatically got up and threw everything there without thinking twice.
Alam niyang nasaktan ito. He was expecting her to cry or lash out, but she calmly took the trash and started taking the rolls out of it, which took him by surprise. He was torn between feeling pity and disgust.
"What the hell are you doing?"
"What does it look like I'm doing?"
"Are you going to eat those?" he asked in amusement.
"Do you want me to eat them? Will that make you happy?"
He was caught off guard by her answer. He was very tempted to say yes, just to see if she will do it. But he will never forgive himself if he subjected her to that kind of torture.
Nagkibit-balikat na lamang siya. "If you want to, then feel free."
Napasapo siya. Did he really say that? And what about last night? It was suppposed to be their honeymoon, but he pushed her away. It's not that he doesn't want her. On the contrary, he wants her so badly. He aches for her. All those years, si Ahn lang ang ginusto niya. She's the only woman he wants to be with, the only one he wants to protect and to love, pero ngayong malaya na syang gawin ang lahat ng iyon, saka naman niya sinasayang ang pagkakataon.
Instead of making her feel loved, he made her sleep inside the room where he put all his useless junks away. Walang bumbilya, walang electric fan at ni walang bintana. Maalikabok pa roon dahil hindi naman niya iyon nilinis.
He could see the red patches on her skin the next morning. But he didn't hear any complaint from her.
He drank the coffee slowly. Ayaw muna niyang umuwi. Pagbalik niya, nandoon pa rin si Ahn. And her presence will just make him go crazy. After finishing the cup, he ordered another one. He also bought cake dahil baka samaan siya kung puro kape lang.
