The Unknown Road

Epilogue - Tessa

I CAN'T TELL NELLY what happened, not until I know myself.

Exploring town is obviously out, but if Dad thinks I'm not coming home after hearing that he has another thing coming, and that's exactly what I tell Nelly, who agrees. She leaves me for a minute to grab her purse before she books me onto the next train to London, and within half an hour she has me out the door and into Pat's car, which speeds me to the station.

Through blurry eyes I find my seat and sit, staring out the window for the five hours it takes to get into Kings Cross. I don't move, I don't speak, I just stare... and by the time I get into Loughton on the tube, I feel like a zombie. My heart doesn't feel like it's beating anymore and my legs feel like lead as I make my way slowly towards home, towards the truth of what's happened.

It's just gone six by the time I get home, and I can see a light on in the front room, so I know someone's home at least. That would have sunk my mood even further.

My hand shakes as I pull out my key and open the door, and I'm met with confused and tear-filled eyes when both Millie and Dad rush towards me.

"Tessa?" Dad asks incredulously. "Wha-" he shakes his head. "What are you doing here?"

I sniff, and even though I know it's useless to wipe at my cheeks, I do it anyway. My sleeve comes away wet and as I try to form a sentence, my eyes sting.

"I need to see him," I manage to say, my breathing raggedy as my voice fluctuates between hysterical and angry as Millie and Dad look at each other.

"See who?" Dad asks.

I let out a sob as I feebly hit at his shoulder, wondering why he's tormenting me with these questions when he must know who I mean.

"Dad, I want to see Archie." I sob. "What happened to him?" I ask, wiping at my cheeks again as I feel snot coming out of my nose. I must look a sight but I don't care. "He was fine. He was fine!" I yell, trying to get my head around it all.

Millie steps forwards and captures my hands with hers before pulling me into a hug. "Tess... Archie's still... alive."

My head snaps up but I don't know if I feel relieved... The news is obviously a relief, but I know I might have to prepare myself for what's about to come next.

"But you said..." I turn to Dad. "You said he's gone."

I look between the two of them as they stare dumbfounded at me. And as realisation hits, I can't believe I'd been so stupid to think he was dead. I suppose my mind immediately went to what I thought was worst... as I didn't want to think he'd leave on purpose. He wouldn't do that... Would he?

"How did he..."

Millie pulls me into another hug before she pulls me over to the kitchen table. She sits me down and takes my hand, taking a deep breath as she starts her explanation.

"We needed to get milk for tea... so I went out."

Although Archie wasn't necessarily aware of what Dad, Millie and I had been doing when he came back from the hospital, we had been checking up on him. After what he'd been saying to Dad about not deserving to be a part of the family anymore, we thought he'd do something reckless and stupid... or something he would regret.

"I was out for like fifteen minutes, tops, and when I got back home it all just felt... empty."

Tears were building in her eyes. "Millie it isn't your fault, sweetie," Dad says, and I agree. I hated that she felt guilty for something that we shouldn't have needed to worry about before the accident.