The Summer of Ryland

18. Forgiveness

Eliza's POV

It has been two days since the bookstore accident. Ryland has not answered any of my phone calls or texts. I even went over to his house. Asia took me over there to get my car and he wasn't answering the door as well. It was like I broke up with Kai again. I needed to talk to him. He was the only one that understood me. He was the only one that cared. 

Speaking of Kai. I haven't heard from him ever since the kiss we shared. Well, it was a little bit more than a kiss but still. And the hickey he left on my neck didn't go away until two days ago. I was mad but I wouldn't go back and change it. If that was the last time that I will be able to kiss his lips, then I'm satisfied. The only thing is I wished that I could go back in time and give him my virginity. With Ryland it wasn't special.

"Come on Madam E. I know you're a freak," Ryland said as he nibbled on my ear.

"I'm not ready yet," I responded.

"Come on. If you like you would do it. You don't like me?" He stopped nibbling on me and looked at me.

"I do like you."

"So what's the problem?" I looked at him. I wanted it to be special and I was scared. But Kai never asked me these questions. He just stopped, so I was stumped.

"See. Please Madam E."

"Okay."

I sat on my bed looking at the ceiling. The only thing that I have done was text Asia. She wanted to make sure I was okay. I wasn't. I felt like a fat blob that can't keep anyone around me. I keep pushing Kai away and now I was pushing Ryland away. I am a joke. Ryland was right all along. It was hard for someone to love me. 

I turned to my side wanting the pain to end. My mother hates me, my brothers don't care about me, my father stopped trying, and now Ryland was gone. At some point in time, I fell asleep. 

I was startled awake by banging on the door. I look at my phone and see that Asia texted me she was on her way 30 minutes ago. Getting up, I groggily made my way downstairs. The banging became louder, so I hurried up a little bit. Asia was getting on my nerves already. Opening the door I was prepared to yell at her but then I saw that it was Ryland. He held in one hand flowers and in the other one beer. I let him in the house. He hands me the flowers and looks at me. When I take it I throw them down on the floor.

"What the hell was that for?" Ryland screamed. Narrowing my eyes toward him I go towards my room. His heavy steps follow me.

"Eliza!" He yells. I ignore him and close the door to my room. He bangs on my door and I yell at him. 

"Open the door!" I hit the door back and I hear him hiss.

"You come here and expect me to accept you with open arms?" I hear him lean against the door and sigh.

"I fucked up. I know. But Madam E let me in." I debate for a second and then I open the door. He looks at me with his beautiful hazel eyes. He walked into my room and I stayed by the door. Plopping on my bed he looked at me.

"What do you want Ryland?"

"I want you."

"I'm still mad at you. Do you know how embarrassing that was for me?" He smirked at me.

"Why because of Kai," he said putting emphasis on Kai's name.

"Why did you say Kai's name like that?"

"Cause I'm jealous okay. Is that what you want to hear?" I see his hard exterior come out. It's the most vulnerable I have ever seen him. 

"I like you, Ryland. I'm with you." He looked at me with a smile. He backed me out of my room to the wall. He started attacking my neck and I instantly knew what he wanted to do. He grabbed my butt and squeezed it.

"Ryland. Do you expect me to have sex with you now?" I asked as he put his hands in my pants.

"I said that I wanted you," he responded. I pushed him away.

"No. We just made up." He looked at me and rolled his eyes.

"That's why we should have makeup sex." He went back toward my neck area but I pushed him away again. I made my way downstairs and sat on my couch. He came and sat next to me, grumbling. He knew not to push his luck. Turning on the television, Ryland surfed the channels. We sat in silence until the doorbell rang.

"Oh look. I have a doorbell," I said.

"Don't talk to me that way fat ass." I sucked in my breath and answered the door. Asia was there with pizza from our favorite place. 

"Sorry I'm late," she said pushing her way into my home. As she came in she looked at the couch. Ryland looked back at her with a frown. 

"He just came over," I explained. She smiled and went to put the pizza on the coffee table. 

"I'll just leave." Once she said that I rushed over to stop her. She didn't like him, especially since he left me stranded. She kept saying that I should leave him and hop on Kai.

"Don't go. We can all hang out. Right, Ry?" He hums in response looking at her. He doesn't like Asia but I hope that if they hung out it would be better. Maybe he would like her.

Okay, I was wrong. They hate each other. 

"Bitch!" screamed Ryland.

"Oh, imma bitch? You left Eliza stranded asshat. She should have dumped you." She stood in front of him.

"You better watch who you're talking to little girl." Ryland says stepping closer. 

"What are you going to do? Huh?" I walk up to Asia to try to pull her back. I can't believe how fast this happened.

"How are you guys friends?" Ryland asked Asia.

"We met in school." She left out the important details not wanting him to know about her.

"It doesn't seem like you would run in the same circle?"

"Please enlighten me."

"Well you're a slut and she's a fat ass." Asia went crazy.

"You don't want to play with me," Ryland says as Asia starts to gather her things.

"Eliza I have to go."

"Bye slut." Ryland sneered. After that Asia spit at him. As soon as the spit hit him Ryland slapped her on her face. Asia went to the floor. Shocked I ran to her on the floor. Ryland towered over us. 

"Do that again!" he screamed. He was breathing so hard that it became visible. Asia got up and ran towards her car and zoomed off. Ryland came towards me and pulled me up toward my bedroom. I kicked and screamed the entire way there. 

"Shut up!" he yelled as he lifted his hand toward me. I cowered in fear. When he noticed it and he put his hand down.

"I'm sorry. Let's go sleep." I got up from the floor and made my way to my bed. I was too scared to do anything other than what he said. He got in the bed with me and I felt his arms wrap around me. I flinched a little bit.

"I won't hurt you. I promise," he said.

He won't hurt me, I repeated. He promised.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From this point forward there will be triggers. With love.