Be My Starlight

Aftermath

POV- Sherlock

I wake suddenly, trying to piece together where the hell I am. My limbs are heavy, whole body aching. John's hand is gripping mine, his head lying on the bed. Its not my bed. Not my room. Mycroft is sleeping in the other chair, snoring softly in the corner.

"John?"

"Hmm? Sherlock, you're up!"

"Where am I?"

I try to sit up, attempting to grab John's hand as he shifts away. My hands won't move, bound at the wrists. The same is true with my chest and ankles. I feel my heart rate increase, I begin to hyperventilate.

"Sherlock, calm down. Please. Breathe."

I struggle against the restraints holding me to the hospital bed, trying to break loose. Mycroft jolts awake when I yell at John, trying to get him to let me out.

"Hey! Sherlock, relax. You need to calm down."

John backs away, closer to Mycroft. Both of them are terrified, avoiding me as I lose my mind again. Im screaming things at them now, shaking the bed with my attempts to free myself. The IV rips out of my arm, knocking over the stand. The heart monitor is beeping rapidly now, bringing more people into the small room. My claustrophobia is kicking in alongside my anxiety. Too many people. A nurse walks calmly to my side, trying to help restrain me. They finally pin me back down against the bed, someone sticks another needle in my arm. Slowly I begin to calm, the sedative taking effect. Someone tries to pull John and Mycroft from the room, making me panic again. I cant move very well, being restrained and sedated, but I can still yell. I scream at everyone, falling into another state of blind rage. John comes back in and sits on the edge of the bed, ready to spring back up if needed. His hand slowly reaches up to my face, wiping the tears away.

"You're going to be okay. I'm not leaving, I promise. I'm staying right here."

A nurse stays in the doorway, keeping a close eye on me. John lies down on the bed beside me, pulling the restraints looser. The nurse makes a move to stop him, but backs off when John snaps at her. I manage to work my way out of the straps, reaching down to pull my legs loose. John watches me closely, still not fully trusting my sanity. I don't either. He pulls my head to his chest, knowing that listening to his heart beat will settle my anxiety to a manageable point.

"WILLIAM!"

John and I both jump up, him almost falling off the bed. My heart stops, only indication I'm still alive is the beep of the monitor. I reach my hand out, looking for John's. My father storms into the room, yelling at the nurse to leave. His eyes are murderous, clearly they found out what happened. My mum walks in, looking a mess. She remains silent, my father's presence filling the room.

"What the hell were you thinking? Do you want to die William! There are better ways of doing it!"

Im trembling again, barely feeling Johns hand in mine. In fact, he is gone, now instead stomping closer to my father.

"Bloody hell! Don't say that! Ever! Leave Sherlock alone, it's your fault he's in here anyways."

Mycroft rushes in and, noting the heated situation, pulls mother out of the room. Father yells at John now, further enraging me. I lunge at him, slamming into his chest. He slams me down onto the rock solid linoleum floor, releasing me as soon as I make impact. I jump back up, ignoring the sharp pains that shoot through my body. My hands lock around his throat, rational thought gone. Mycroft skids back in and drags me off of father, throwing him out of the room. I scream at Mycroft again, letting my rage spill over. He sits there and takes everything, not doing anything to stop me. John grabs me from behind after I punch Mycroft again, pulling me to the ground. I struggle for a few minutes, his arms locked around me. He finally manages to talk me down, waving off the nurse who runs in.

"I've got him. Go away."

She leaves, nervously looking at Mycroft before she walks out the door. Now that John has calmed me down, I realize what I have done. My brothers face and hands are covered in blood, though I'm not sure who's. John notices me looking around and pulls me closer to him. I turn and bury my face in his chest, crying and shaking again. He holds me tighter when the door opens again, I cant see who it is. Not that I care. Someone tries to pull us apart, backing off when both John and Mycroft protest. I relax again, knowing I am safe here in Johns arms. Him and Mycroft sit on the floor with me talking as I drift off to sleep.

I wake up back in the bed, John lying nestled against me. Mycroft is once again sleeping in the corner chair. I wrap my arms around John, feeling suddenly calm.

"Hey, how're you feeling?"

"What happened?"

John explains the events of yesterday and the night before, finishing with how I almost broke Mycroft's nose. I start crying again, which visibly disappoints John. He has a sad look in his eyes when he looks at me, he can see just how broken I am. Mycroft wakes soon after and, seeing the state I am in, leaves the room. His face is swollen and red, a bit of dried blood still crusted to his nose. He returns later and tells me to get dressed.

"What?"

"We're leaving. Now."

They leave and I hastily pull my clothes on, leaving the room as soon as I am dressed. John grabs my hand again and doesn't let go till we get into Mycroft's car.

"I just had this cleaned, if you could refrain from puking all over it that would be brilliant Sherlock."

"Don't remember doing that."

John pulls me against him again, holding me tighter than usual.

"What's goin' on John?"

"We're taking you to get some help."