Heartbreak Warfare

18.

There I am, standing on the moors. Mist surrounds me as dawn breaks on the skyline. A smile creeps onto my face as I see a figure in the distance. My own Mr Darcy. I stretched out my arm, wanting to reach him. No sooner had I done that then my mind had taken a lovely stroll, only to fall down a rabbit hole.

I squint my eyes shut. I can feel the light against my eyelids. Shaking my head furiously I turn myself so that my face is in my pillow. My body tenses, I feel someone close by my side. I try not to make it obvious that I'm awake. No such luck.

"Abbie" I hear him say. His warm hand is placed at the curve of my back. I cease to move and act out calm breathes, though the stupid heartbeat monitor betrays my nerves.

"I get it." Harry whispers. He plants a lovingly small kiss on my head before retreating slowly, leaving me alone to my own sorrows and despairs.

"You're too broken," plays repeatedly in my head. My heart did whisper that he had done it for myself.

I woke up a second time to darkness. The drugs have seemed to have worn off, unfortunately for me. I opened my eyes and squinted to see my surroundings. It becomes apparent that there are 3, no 4 people in the room with me. One small one curled up with one medium person on a mattress and two others on opposite sides of the room. I notice a buzzing sound next to my ear and grapple above my head to reach an unknown object. Harry's phone. It must be, last time I checked he was the only one stupid enough to leave such an expensive thing lying around. I switch it on and find a photo of myself painting. He must have taken it whilst I wasn't looking. Creepy as it is I can't help but be endeared by this presentation of deep affection. Harry obviously hasn't gotten over me. And I him. I slide the phone open to investigate why it was buzzing and am rewarded with an answer almost immediately. Clicking into his messages I see about 12 messages from a 'K'. Kendall.

"Hey babe! Where'd you go?"

"Are you out of reception?"

"Have you gone to get something?"

"Where the hell are you?"

"Far out Harry this isn't funny!"

"Ugh you're so ridiculous."

"Sick of your shit..."

I punch in a few words, but resist the temptation to send it. The messages from her don't stop, instead they keep flowing, similar to my tears. The harder I try to stop the tears, the more I cry. I press the phone into my chest, hoping that somehow it will erase what I just saw. As the pain begins to erupt I feel long fingers grab the phone and wrench it out of my hand.

"Harry?" I question, reaching my hands out to find him in the dark.

"You shouldn't be looking through my phone," his husky voice replies

"I-I'm sorry... I jus-just... It was buzzing," I mumble

"Yeah well it's none of your business why it's buzzing." He says harshly. Anger is the first emotion to erupt at his words.

"Wanted to keep your little girlfriend a secret huh? Didn't want me to find out? Well guess what! I already did, yesterday!"

"Is this why you did...this" Harry probes angrily

"No I didn't throw myself of a goddam building because you have a girlfriend!" Lies. All lies. Big lies.

"She's not my girlfriend. What we have was organised by management, understand?" He says harshly. When I fail to reply he says

"Little but jealous were you?"

"Why are you even here." I spit quietly. A long silence follows. He runs his fingers through his hair and I fidget, tracing the lines along my left palm. For a while we stay like this until Harry breaks the silence.

"I don't know. This was a mistake. I should leave." His voice falters at the last part. I see the outline of his noticeably larger frame head towards the door and I call out for him

"Harry, please," I cry gripping onto his arm and using my little strength to pull him back to me.

"Please let's just... Let's just pretend." I sob. My grip on him softens, but he does not leave.

"Let's just pretend. Pretend that I'm sick and that I'm dying. Pretend that... That you still love me. Pretend that you have to leave me, that you have no choice. Pretend that you still care. Please Harry. Then you can leave." I manage to choke out the entirety of my speech before rolling my head away and closing my eyes. I prepare myself to hear the click of the door, but I feel warm arms around me. Encasing me, making me feel safe and warm. Harry plants soft kisses up my neck and along my chin. He nuzzles his face into my neck pulling me closer into his chest. I turn around so I'm facing him.

"Just pretend." He breathes

"Just pretend." I agree. Instantly I fall into a deep sleep.

I grapple with the sheets, trying to find him again. My eyebrows furrow together when all I feel is an empty mattress. Opening my eyes again I see only three people. Mum, Libby and Connor?

"Thank god your awake!" Connor gushes and runs to my side "I'm so sorry for what I said to you, it's just..." He leans and whispers "I'm, I'm gay."

I nod my head and give him a big hug.

"I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have done that it was very unreasonable of me to kiss you. And Connor?"

"Yes?"

"You were NOT the reason I stepped off the balcony that night." I state and he smiles in relief.

"I have to get going and organise some things for you about, well publicity rumours and stuff, but I'll be back to visit soon ok?"

"Thank you. Your my guardian I swear!" I thank him before he goes to leave. The door clicks and I'm left alone with my family. I look over at my mum and see tears spilling down her high cheekbones.

"Mum..." I mutter and reach out for her. She walks over with Libby and plops my little sister on the bottom of my bed.

"Mum, I'm so sorry. Everything just got to me." I try to reason

"My baby, look at you. Your hurt and your apologising!" She pushes my hair back and I sigh

"What am I going to say to all the people?" I ask her. I'm so afraid right now I just want to hide.

"Don't worry about it, we will sort it out. Just go back to sleep now..."

My mother slowly lulls me to sleep.

Strong arms wrap under me, pulling my body away from warmth. I squirm at their cold touch. Their footsteps echo across wherever we are walking and then I feel the cold air envelope me. A shiver goes through my spine and I let out a small whimper. My 'carrier' holds me close to their chest. A somewhat familiar warms me slightly.

"Where are you taking me?" I croak weakly. No one seems to hear me. I overhear my mother, obviously talking to whoever is holding me.

"You must take her now! As far as we know she never jumped off the dammed building! She flew over to you after the Vanity fair interview and has been there ever since." She states. I feel a light kiss on my head and then I am put back onto a comfortable surface. Finally.

I'm sorry this is short, but I hope you liked it :) - xodaisy