58: Natalie

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(um, this is really 57 part 2… after sort of a change of mind and wanting to add this on... so well, I did.  So this is right after chapter 57 and still in the car, while Natalie drives Evie home, and not later on another day or whatever...   um, mainly so the On Friday thing can continue… um, sorry?)

“So,” Evie said, after a moment. “Since we’re just sitting here...”

Natalie looked over at her.

“What isn’t fun or perfect or whatever?” Evie said.

Natalie didn’t understand. “How do you mean.”

“We said this is fun, yeah?”

Natalie nodded.

“And that’s good,” Evie said. “Yay I’m glad. But is there anything you want to change?”

“About us?”

“Yep.”

“Isn’t it a bit soon to be talking about this?” Natalie said.

“Maybe. But if we leave it for later on we’ll just fuck and then go to sleep. So now seems good. While we sit in traffic.”

Natalie laughed.

“I mean it,” Evie said.

“I know.”

“So is there anything?”

Natalie thought. “Maybe,” she said. “I don’t know if I should say.”

“Oh,” Evie said, seeming surprised. “Well, you’d better now, hadn’t you?”

Natalie realized she might have made a mistake. Evie might just have wanted reassurance, not an actual conversation. “I didn’t mean…” Natalie said.

“Yeah you did,” Evie said. “So now you should probably just tell me or I’ll worry.”

Natalie hesitated. It hadn’t occurred to her that Evie might worry too. The traffic ahead of them began to move, so Natalie drove forward, slowly. “I want more,” she said, in the end. “More with you.”

“More what?”

“I don’t know,” Natalie said. “More everything.”

Evie seemed to be thinking. “Everything?” she said. “What does that mean?”

“I don’t know.”

“Tell me.”

Natalie suddenly felt terribly insecure. “No,” she said. “I shouldn’t. We should stop this.”

“Please?”

Natalie bit her lip, and decided to be honest. “I want you,” she said. “That’s all. However much you do or don’t want from me, I do want you. Eventually, I mean. One day.”

“Seriously?” Evie said, flatly.

Natalie nodded. “Yes.”

“Don’t be an asshole,” Evie said.

Natalie looked over at her, surprised. Evie sounded strange. Natalie glanced over as best she could while still watching the road, and took a moment to realize. Evie was angry. Natalie didn’t understand why.

“Oh god,” Natalie said. “I knew I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“Well it’s too late now.”

Natalie felt helpless. She looked at the traffic ahead of her, wishing she could take back what she’d said.

“So, what do you mean,” Evie said. “Like run away with me? And we live happily ever after?”

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