Please Stay (Kazer)

I'm Here

After I parked into the first parking stall that I could find, I sprinted into the E.R. and right to the front desk.

A young girl sat on the other side of the big desk. She was typing away, not paying attention to anything around her. I didn't feel very patient, so I quickly spoke, "Excuse me."

That snapped her out of her little world pretty quickly. She gave me a slight smile before she said, "I'm sorry, sir, what can I help you with?"

"I just got a call from here saying that my... friend is here," I quietly stuttered.

"Name please?" she asked again playing on her computer.

"Jonathan Toews."

Once the name hit her ears, she looked right up to me. "Are you Patrick? I talked to you early." I quickly nodded my head. "He is still in surgery. Why don't I bring you to a private waiting room?"

I didn't say anything, I just waited for her to come around her desk. The journey wasn't that long, but the farther we went, the more scared I got.

Once we finally reached our vacated destination, I finally asked, "Will you tell me what's wrong with him?"

She nodded. "I'm sorry, sir. He got hit by a car early. When he got here, he didn't look that good. The doctors are nervous that he won't survive the surgery, but I bet he's a fighter."

Water started to fill my eyes. "He is," I barely whispered it before she walked out leaving me all alone. I sulked into one of the many chairs and let the tears flow.

I didn't care anymore trying to contain my emotions. I am all alone, and the love of my life is probably going to die. I can't survive without him!

It took every ounce of myself to restrain me from doing what I greatest desire at this moment: find Jonathan. I felt like I was falling apart without having him right beside me, knowing that he's going to be okay. He has to be okay!

After what seemed like four hours, but the clock on the other side of the room said it only have been five minutes, I snapped out of my train of thoughts. I knew that I had to do something, and if it wasn't helping Jonathan then I would have to tell our families.

I slowly took out my phone, and found the person I needed to call, Mama Tazer. I hesitated before I pushed the back button. I couldn't tell her just yet. Andrée is more that just Jonny's mom. She is like my second mom. If I can't talk to my own mom, then I call her. Jonny's and my relationship made both of our families extremely close. My sisters are Jonathan's sisters. David is my brother. Bryan and Andrée are my second parents, and Pat Sr. and Donna are Jonny's second parents.

Even though we are all close, I couldn't bring myself to call the Toews first. Instead, I called Mama Kaner. "What's wrong, Patrick?" she asked as soon as she answered the phone.

I held the tears in as much as I could. "How can you tell something is wrong?"

"Because I know my son, and you are supposed to be on a plane right now. So, what's going on, honey?" As soon as she said that, I couldn't contain my trapped tears anymore. I let the all flood out once again. "Tell me what's wrong, and then your father and I will be on the next flight."

"J... Jon..." I managed to get out through my hard core crying. "Is... hur...t!"

I heard her breath hitch. "Jon's hurt? Are you at the hospital?"

"Y...yes. Mommy, it don't look good."

"Okay, your dad and I will be out there right away. What happened?" I don't know how she did it, but she kept calm throughout this whole call. I could hear the sadness in her voice, but she was extremely calm.

I didn't speak right away, so she asked me again. I didn't know if I could repeat what happened, but I had to try. I looked up at the clock which read 5:02 to calm myself down.

"We go into a fight, so he stormed out of the apartment. Mommy, he got hit by a car. They say that he most likely won't survive. Mommy, this is all my fault!" Once I said the last sentence, the emotions that barely cleared, downpoured once more.

"Pat... Patrick," my mom's fierce voice came through the speaker. "This is not your fault. I know that you guys got into a fight, but you didn't hit him. Your dad and I are leaving the house right now. We will be on the next flight to Chicago. Stay strong for me, son. Did you tell Andrée and Bryan?"

"No..." I croaked.

"Okay, give yourself couple of minutes to calm down then call them. They need to know. I love you, Patrick. We'll be there as soon as we can." I nodded to myself. I couldn't bring myself to respond to her. "Patrick?"

"Yeah... I'll see you." I hung the phone up as soon as I said that.

I put my elbows on my knees and my head was down in despair. I have to call them, but I don't feel like I physically can. They have to know, but why do I have to tell them. They are going to hate me for this.

I quickly found her name. No, I can't do this! I was about to close out of her name again, but at the last second I pushed call. Slowly, I put the phone to my ear. The phone rang and rang. Hopefully, she doesn't answer, but on the last ring, Andrée answered.

"Àllo ?"

Oh, I can't do this. I can't tell her.

"Àllo ? Patrick is this you?"

My voice couldn't come out. I don't even know if I was trying or not.

"Àllo ?"

"Hi," my meekly little voice came through.

"Patrick?"

"Yes, I have some bad news. Jonathan got hit today by a car. I don't know how he's doing, but the doctors don't look hopeful. Can you come down here? He's in surgery right now," I said quietly but quickly.

The line was quiet. I didn't dare to say anything more. I listened to her sobs when the realization finally hit her. "But... he's alive, right?"

"To my knowledge, yes," I said grimly.

"Um... okay. We'll come on down. Patrick, when you can, can you be with my little boy and make sure that he's alright?" she asked sadly."

"Yes, Mama Toews, I will."

"Everything will be alright, Patrick. Just remember that. Is your parents coming down, too?"

"Yes."

"Okay, we'll be down there as soon as we can. And... um Patrick? How are you doing?"

I took in a deep shaky breath. I wasn't expecting for her to ask me that. "I have been better."

"Well... hang in there. Love you, Pat. Take care of my little boy."

Before I could hang up, she ended the call. Sitting there I knew that I had hours before either of the will make it down here. In those hours, something major could happen. I just pray that it's not something too bad. I feel like I'm collapsing. Why couldn't it have been me?