I didn't celebrate my birthday because the stupid elevator got jammed again and I got out until like one in the morning. I opened my presents after mom left today in the morning and ate a piece of my cake. Tobias is with his girlfriend and Jaz is in my room getting ready as I read The Hunger Games, which is a gift from her.
''I just have to go to the library and meet the girls there so we can finish our project.'' She says applying mascara even though she doesn't need it.
''You know, whenever we go out, Tobias always acts as my boyfriend.'' I tell her and she pretends to gag.
''Gross.'' She says putting on some eyeliner.
''So tonight I'll have to act like your girlfriend.'' She pokes her eyes and bends down with a hand on her face.
''Shit that hurt!'' She says but starts laughing anyway. We here the doorbell ring and she runs downstairs after I ask her to flip out the lights. The moonlight is enough for me to read. I hear open the door, ''Thanks for coming.''
I hear footsteps coming up again and then I hear, "Hello.'' Oh dear God, please let it be one of Jazmine's friends with a British accent. I look up shutting my book and there is Tom. I'm momentarily in shock so I just sit up in my bed with my mouth opening and closing like a freaking fish.
''Happy birthday, I'm sorry its late.'' He says taking a package out of his jacket's pocket and setting it on my nightstand. ''Natalie told me that you stopped by yesterday.''
Of course she did, ''I'm so sorry if you guys fought. I just needed to talk to you...'' I stop talking and look down at my shoes embarrassed.
''Fought? What do you mean?'' He asks.
''Fought, like you and her getting in argument or whatever.''
''You think that we're dating or something?'' I nod and I can hear his smile when he says, ''We are not dating.''
I look up at him and ask, ''Really?''
He sits down beside me, ''Sia I love you. I always will. There is no one else in the world like you for me.''
''I'm sorry for acting like I didn't recognize you, because you're right about me. I'm confused and you don't have time for that in your life.''
''No.'' He grabs my chin and tilts it up so he's looking into my eyes. ''I just said those things so you would let me go. I am so sorry for what I said.'' He takes a deep breath, ''I have to tell you something about your accident.''
''Tom, I remember everything. And it wasn't your fault. I was yelling and pressuring you when all you wanted was to take me home. I am sorry because of that. You got hurt because of me. You don't have to feel guilty...you should be the one mad at me, not at yourself.''
He sighs, ''Why are we doing this? We keep blaming ourselves.''
''I don't know. Jaz told me that this will happen and she's right. We need...we have to blame someone for what happened but there's really no one to blame here.''
He looks at me with tortured eyes filled with pain, grief and fear. ''It was just so horrid, Sia.'' Tears fill his beautiful eyes when he starts remembering of everything that happened that day. ''Your mother and you had a fight over me not being able to see you anymore. You were crying and very upset about by the whole incident. We were just driving and then...then I looked out the window and saw the car coming and suddenly we were flipping through the air. I broke a few bones but I couldn't feel anything so I crawled out of the car. You were still inside but you weren't breathing and there was so much blood everywhere. I got you out and held you but you wouldn't wake up. They took you in a separate ambulance but I had lost all hope because your heart stopped. I felt like I had lost you and I was so desperate and...'' He looks for words to express himself but I can see all the anguish written all over his face. He's talking faster, looking around frantically and shaking.
