Dear Aaron,

Page 15

I did a whole lot of nothing when you were gone. But even though that time without you is one big blur of boring, I do remember something happening everyday that I wanted to tell you about.

Then one day, I saw you. You were paler, skinnier. But I didn't think. I just reacted. I threw my book at you and started yelling.

"You left me! I've been through hell these past four weeks. And where have you been? While I've been here, scared and alone. Where were you?" I knew I was being selfish, but I hurt too much to care. Tears streamed from my eyes as I walked toward the window.

"What do you want, Aaron?" I asked.

I heard you take a step toward me.

"Blue eyes-"

"What do you want, Aaron?" I was surprised at how cold my voice came out. I was being difficult. I was making it harder on you.

I'm sorry I did that.

"You," you answered, "just you".

I stared out the window, letting the tears fall down my face. Only you could melt away my anger with a simple answer. I had to ask,

"Where did you go?"

You paused.

"I can't..."

I cut you off as I turned to face you,

"Just please, tell me. I know you don't want to but please?"

You paused, longer this time.

"I... I'm sick."

Deep down, I think I knew what you meant. But I still said,

"I know that. That's why you're here."

I saw a tear fall from your eye.

"No, I'm sick," you said sick with emphasis. "I went away to test a new treatment. It failed. They wanted me to stay there, even though I'm- you know. But I refused. I refused because I wanted to be here, with you".

By the time you finished, you were standing in front of me. You wiped my wet cheeks.

"Why didn't you just tell me this?" I asksed. "Instead of disappearing. I thought you used me. Or that you hated me."

I started to turn around, but you grabbed me, turned me to face you and pulled me into a hug. Then you grabbed my face and said,

"Blue eyes, look at me. I couldn't tell you. It hurt too much to tell you. And I didn't want your hopes to get up".

We stood there for a long time. Finally I asked,

"How long?"

"I'm not telling you. Not yet."

I was too exhausted to argue.

"Okay. Okay."