Love's A Hard Game To Play

Disconnect

It took a few minutes but finally, Barbara and Jess calmed Stevie down.
Now she didn't shed a tear; she was tired of crying.
She just laid on her side staring at the wall.

Lindsey didn't come back until two hours later.
He slowly walked into the room and immediately apologized to Barbara and Jess then he walked over and sat on Stevie's bed then placed his hand on her shoulder.
Stevie stiffened.

"Stephanie, baby, I'm sorry I walked out on you. I'm so so sorry." Lindsey said his voice trembling.
Stevie turned around pushing his hand away; she looked into Lindsey's eyes and he saw hurt and anger in them.
"Why did you walk away? I begged you not to....I needed you." Stevie sobbed, tears making their way down her cheeks.
Lindsey's tears rolled down his cheeks. "Please forgive me."
Stevie pushed him away again and back down facing away from him. "Go away." She said.

Lindsey knew he messed up; he wasn't going to leave her now or ever again.
He laid down next to her then wrapped his arm around her waist and brought her closer to him.
Stevie fought against him at first then gave up.
She really needed him; she turned around and buried her head in his chest.

Barbara and Jess decided to give them some time alone. They quietly left the room and they headed to the hospital cafeteria for some coffee.

Lindsey held onto Stevie as she sobbed.
"Steph...I'm sorry. I truly am. When I heard what you went through...what Joe put you through, I wanted to find Joe and hurt him just as badly as he hurt you. Maybe worse....I want to kill that bastard with my bare hands. I needed that walk to cool down before I did something stupid." Lindsey said. "I love you so much Stephanie."

Stevie stayed quiet for a moment then she looked up at him. "I thought...you didn't love me anymore after...hearing everything that was done to me. I thought you would find me disgusting to even touch me again." Stevie said to him. "I feel...so disgusting...I feel so worthless. Just like Joe said."
Lindsey got angry at hearing her go back to feeling like she was worthless. He hated Joe with a passion. Lindsey calmed himself down quickly and said. "As much as I wanted to, I couldn't protect you. We couldn't control or even predict what Joe was going to do. Stephanie, I still and will forever love you; that's never going to change. And Joe is so fucking wrong. You are NOT disgusting or worthless. Don't let his words get to you again please. You are so loving, caring and so beautiful."
Stevie clung to him and sobbed. She didn't know if she would ever be the same person she was before; she had so many fears.
For now, she would just take it one day at a time with her husband by her side.

The weeks that followed were a slow process for Stevie.
Dr. Edwards wanted to see if Stevie was able to eat solid foods which she could but what she ate was very little and he was concerned.
Lindsey however assured him that he would make sure she would eat properly so Dr. Edwards took out the feeding tube.
He released her after a week in the hospital.

Back at home, Stevie tried her best to readjust to living back at home. It felt foreign to her; for some reason she felt out of place. She hated this feeling.
She had asked Lindsey if they could move; she no longer felt safe or at ease in her own home.

Lindsey began looking for a new house for them, for now, they moved into a two bedroom condo by the beach. Stevie felt like she could breathe again.

During Stevie's recovery, Lindsey found out that Joe plead guilty. The evidence against him was overwhelming, there was no need for Stevie to testify. She breathed a sigh of relief. She didn't want to face him ever again.
Joe was sentenced to ten years in prison.

Stevie's face and all the various bruises that were all over her body began to heal.
Physically she was healing but emotionally, she was far from it.
Lindsey would try his hardest to help her; he missed seeing her beautiful smile.
Stevie would jump at any little sound or movement.
Lindsey and Stevie friends and family would have to be careful around her.

One day, Stevie had told Lindsey she wanted an abortion; she still didn't want the baby she carrying.
That was the only time Lindsey had gotten really angry with her since she's been home.

"Stevie, there is a chance that this baby is mine! I won't...I won't let you get kill our child!" He said raising his voice. "Even if this baby isn't biologically mine, how could you even want to kill them? This is a child we are talking about." Lindsey stepped closer to her and put his hand on her belly and said more calmly. "Please Steph, don't get rid of them. It doesn't matter to me who the father is. I love them so much already."
Stevie grabbed his wrist and held it tightly; she sobbed, tears rolling hard and fast down her cheeks. She didn't know what to say, she was at a lost for words. She let go of wrist then wrapped her arms around him.
Lindsey did the same and wrapped his arms around her.
"I just can't help but feel this way." She said clinging to him. "I...I won't do it. I'm sorry Lindsey."
Lindsey pulled away and smiled down at her. "It's okay Stephanie. Everything is going to work out. You'll see. I love you."
Stevie looked up at him and smiled a little.
"I love you too."

Stevie and Lindsey went to bed that night, but Stevie didn't fall alseep right away.
She knew she was having irrational thoughts about the baby but she couldn't help feel the disconnection towards her baby.
She didn't understand it; she felt like a horrible person for even thinking of terminating her baby; she felt like a terrible mother already.

Stevie turned around giving her back to Lindsey who was already asleep.
She curled into a ball and cried silently until she drifted off to sleep.

Quick update!
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