A little piece of me

a little piece of me - 23

[let me just warn you that this poem kind of sucks]

My heart hurts and my stomach is churning,

My hands are shaking and my eyes are burning.

I've lost all control of my entire world.

All that's left is a broken girl.

A girl that's scarred.

A girl that's empty.

You better hide all the blades,

oh please don't tempt me.

Do you realize how easy it would be

to let the blood flow?

To slit open my wrists,

and let the pain go?

The sting of the blade

to drown out my pain,

It'd be so easy,

to throw it all away.

I told them all my troubles,

because I'm not as strong as I used to be.

It was hurting them too,

so they tried to help me.

They said "smile babe, you're beautiful"

So I smiled the pain away.

I hid all of my pain,

saved it for a rainy day.

I pretended to be happy,

so I wouldn't bring them down with me,

but inside I was broken,

inside I was empty.

Every little insult just echoed in my bones,

and shook me to the core.

My emotions were conflicting,

they were waging a war.

Sadness against elation,

confusion against clarity.

Misery gave me comfort,

and love was only scaring me.

Nothing matched up,

my mind was all jumbled.

I had fallen off the edge,

and when I got up I stumbled.

My balance was lost,

I slipped on black ice,

I could feel myself falling,

and I went down without a fight.

My nerves are raw,

my mind a mess,

My trust had been broken,

it's no wonder I'm depressed.