Outcasts

Chapter Thirty-Eight (Milo)

I lie on my bed, trying to get to sleep, when suddenly, I hear something chime. A ringtone, MY ringtone. Someone is texting me.

I reach for my phone. Pressing the button, my phone lights up the dark room. The light bounces off my face and my chest, illuminating it all. Who could be texting me at this hour? I wonder. Normal people would be asleep, it IS a school night.

A smile becomes embedded into my face when I read the name of the one who texted me. Jeah, Jeah's not normal, she is the best kind of different.

I open the text eagerly.

Jeah: Hey Milo! Are you awake?

Me: Yeah! What's up?

Jeah: Remember last week, when I wasn't here?

I falter for a second, nervously, before texting. Me: Yeah?

Jeah: I know you and Sye got in a bit of a fight. I know it became physical.

I jump for some reason, even though I know I shouldn't be surprised. I should have suspected she would have found out sooner or later.

Jeah: Is that true?

Me: Yeah. Sye was insulting the Outcasts, so I pushed him. How did you find out?

I see the texting icon pop up several times before disappearing. It's almost like Jeah is evaluating what she is typing, precarious about saying the wrong thing. Finally, Jeah responds.

Jeah: I overheard the rumors, it just took me a while to piece together what actually happened.

Me: Are you mad?

Jeah: Why would I be mad? You stood up for us.

Me: I don't know. I- Pausing, I exhale loudly. I am partially the reason Sye has been "extra friendly".

Jeah: I don't think that's true. Sye is just a tool who likes to blame us for everything.

Oh, I realize how stupid I've been.

Jeah: Did you really think this was all because of you?

I somehow feel guilty when I tell the truth. Me: Yes

I can picture Jeah, at the other end of the phone, laughing at my stupidity. Laughing at how much I make a fool of myself, and how I am imperfect.

When I read her response, I am reminded that Jeah isn't that type of person at all. Jeah: Milo you blame yourself for too much. You are a great person, who doesn't deserve to feel guilt or sadness. Even though you pushed Sye down, you are still a nice person. Plus you've been taking all the pain and worry onto your own shoulders.

Thank you.

Up to this point, my brain is a dark sea of confusion. The only place I can look to is the bright phone screen, where clarity forms among the haziness. Why would she thank me? What did I do to deserve this? I did something so out of line. I got a detention! I don't understand! Me: For what?

Jeah: For being you. :) 

I stare at the yellow emoji on my screen, a smiley face. Bright eyes, genuine smile. Happy, yellow, bright. What does it mean?

Typing three words out quickly with my fingers, I smile ear to ear. Milo: Thank you Jeah!

Jeah begins to respond. Jeah: So, how's your mom

Not so good. Me: Great

Jeah: Oh...so the chemotherapy is working?

Me: Yes.