The Self(ie) Love Project

My Confession

Hey pastels, I have a confession. Its not something that I'm very proud of, but you deserve to know exactly why I ended the book so abruptly.
I suffer from sever depression, and my medication hasn't been working lately. I felt stuck, sad, worthless, unwanted and unloved. I found it incredibly hard you help you guys when I couldn't help myself.
Shortly after ending this book I was feeling down. I was in a really dark place. I wanted an escape. I wanted to die. So, in my uncontrollable metal state, I overdosed.
I thought it was going to work this time. As the meds rapidly put me to sleep, I had a dream. I dreamed of all my family and friends and how they were dealing with me being gone.
I saw my boyfriend crying, I reached out to comfort him but he didn't respond. My parents were just starting at my pictures. I tried to tell them I wasn't gone, but they didn't hear. My heart broke when I saw Roro, Lexis and Kaden. They were sitting in a circle talking about me. I tried to join and hug them and tell them I loved them, but I was invisible.
After this dream, I had an epiphany. Suicide was not the answer. Reaching out to my friends and family and loving them was. So as you read this book for possibly the last time, I want you to remember you are always loved.
You are loved by people who you haven't met, and cherished greatly by those you have. Don't take your life for granted, you only get one chance. So make it a great one.