Vårdslös ~ Bellamy Blake [2]

XXVII- Changing

Bonjourno, it's-a me!

Onwards, my noble steed for I want to get this god forsaken chapter out of the way.

(Not edited bc charging my motivation to send it to my editor, pls excuse mistakes, I'm sure there's a lot.)

Bold= Swedishhhhh

T W E N T Y   S E V E N | CHANGING

Carter officially resented her legs.

There was an entire body to injure, but no. Apparently her legs were like targets for all sorts of attacks and it sucked. Why couldn't Doctor Oak stab her in the arm? Why the freaking thigh?

She seethed in pain every time the smallest amount of pressure was applied to her foot and she had to use the wall to help her walk. Unintentionally, she left dark crimson stains on white in the shape of distorted fingerprints. It wasn't just her blood either.

Before she left the dank little room, she made sure to grab Bellamy's jacket and a few others things before leaving the corpse alone without a second's thought.

It irked her how little she cared for the man that lay dead in a room because of her. A man that was probably just following orders. A man could have just simply been doing his job.

And now he was dead, because of her. She felt no remorse and that was what shook her most. There was no guilt, no empathy. Whether that man was innocent or not, the second he agreed to torture her, the second he allowed her friends to be harvest for bone marrow, he became the enemy.

Carter wasn't about to let the enemy win because she felt sorry for him. That wasn't how a war was won. Yet, she still felt like she had lost a large part of herself in that room. The part that spared Ezio's life because she wasn't a killer, the same part that allowed her to be so hopeful and cheery when no one else could.

"Dammit." She hissed under her breath, sliding down the wall with exhaustion. She had no idea where she was or how far was left until she was reunited with her friends. Her head hung low as she twisted the scalpel in her bloodied hands, examining every inch of it. The weapon she killed someone with.

"You did the right thing." A familiar voice reassured from beside her. She didn't look up.

"Did I? Because it sure as hell doesn't feel like it." She sighed, watching as the small surgical tool twisted in the air. "I'm not a killer, Finn, that's not me."

"It is now," Her best friend murmured and she finally looked up at him with furrowed brows. He smiled slightly. "I know it was hard and it feels wrong, but you did what you had to. You did it to survive."

"I have no pity for that man, but that doesn't mean his death was my decision to make." Carter sighed, running her hand through her hair.

"It was kill or be killed Carter, you didn't have a choice yourself." He ran his thumb over her cheek and Carter looked down at the blade again. He may have been right, but that didn't make her feel any better.

She blew out the air between her cheeks and let her head rest against the wall. She couldn't move any further, she was utterly drained of energy and even though she wanted to push forward and save everyone she loved, she just couldn't physically get her body to move. It was too much.

So when she heard the sound of someone running towards her, she just smiled dryly. It was only her luck to escape one near-death experience to then be put right into another.