Forbidden Literature

42| Graduation

One Day Before Graduation

For some reason the night before graduation sleep couldn't find me. I tossed and turned, hoping not to wake Jasper, but when I rolled over once more a warm arm slung over me forcing me to stop.

"You okay, babe?" he asked.

I looked up to faintly make out Jasper's face in the darkness. Even then I can see his look of concern. I offered him a faint smile, hoping he'd find it. "I can't sleep."

He shuffled closer and used his hand to stroke some stray hairs from my face. "Bad dream?"

"No," I shook my head. "Just . . . too many thoughts."

"Ah. Pre-graduation jitters."

I bit my lower lip. "But that's silly, right? I mean, I am excited to graduate. I shouldn't be nervous. It means I get to be with you. I can do this," I snuggled closer, "every chance I get without fear."

"Yes, that's true," he kissed my forehead. "But that doesn't mean you can't be nervous. I know I was."

I raised an eyebrow. "You were?"

"Of course. Even the best of us get anxious."

"I don't know about best of us--"

"I was anxious about not falling on my face," he admitted, completely ignoring my comment. Mindlessly his fingers started rubbing up and down my bare back softly. "I had a dream the night before that I grabbed my diploma and fell right there in front of everyone."

I snickered before he continued. "That's not the worst of it. My gown flew open and revealed my boxers to everyone. The entire stadium was laughing at me. The next day I was so terrified Dale had to give me a shot of whiskey before I went up there."

"Really? Wouldn't that make it worse."

He shrugged. "Maybe to some people. But I could tolerate it. It was the amount I drank afterwards that was concerning."

I could only imagine it. I mentally placed myself in the day he graduated surrounded by family and probably wobbling around drunkenly. I wished so badly that I could be a part of his memories, but there is no point in pining over something that can't be fixed. It was time to focus on making memories now.

"You'll be okay, Allison," he kissed my forehead again and added, "You are always fine."

"Mmm," I closed the space between our bodies completely, wrapping up in him entirely. I loved breathing in the familiar scent of honey and spice. "I've missed this."

He rested his chin on top of my head, his fingers still making circles on my back. "You don't know how badly I wanted you to be in my arms."

I smiled against his chest. "What did you do?"

"Hmm?"

"When I was gone, what did you do?"

He paused for a moment. "Well, night times were hardest."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. I have grown so accustomed to sleeping with you, I didn't realize how much I relied on it. When you were gone, and I couldn't even text you, I uh . . . sort of used a pillow and pretended it was you."