I'm A Loser

Chapter 45.

I sat at home later that day in my room just drinking an ale and thinking of knocking on the wall. Would I get one in return like I used to? I decided to take a chance.

One. Two. Three.

I waited a few seconds. Nothing.

I laughed to myself. "Molly you're an idiot." I figured to pass the time until dinner was to take a shower and look over some film.

Beginning to undress I jumped a little at the sound of a knock. Just one. I slowly walked over and just stood, staring at the purple paint. Then a knock again. I bit my lip and knocked two times.

It was almost instantly he knocked back. I broke a smile and touched the wall, knowing not all was bad.
...

After I showered and was called down to eat, I sat next to Anna and took the liberty of feeding her. Sarah seemed happy with this.

"So I got the job." I smiled.

"Congratulations!" Sarah squeaked. Dad shoved a forkful of lasagna in his mouth and furrowed his eyebrows.

"What job??"

"The job Stuart helped me get! A photographer for that music paper I'm always reading." I laughed.

"Typical men always forgetting." Sarah shook her head.

"I was in the middle of enjoyin your wonderful dish love." Dad tried to recover. Sarah just laughed and nudged his face away. I giggled as Anna wiggled around happily. Just then there was a knock on the door.

"I'll get it!" I yelled, jumping out of my seat. George stood before me, looking rather apologetic.

"Hiya. Um...can I come in?"

"Yeah. Of course come on!" I opened wider to let him inside. He looked around and saw everyone in the kitchen.

"I'm sorry I interrupted...."

"No George please. Stay." I held his hand. He looked at my advances and intertwined our fingers together.

"I want to talk about yesterday Molly. Can we um...go upstairs?"

"Yeah of course. Come on." I began to lead the way until there was another knock on the door.

"Get that!" Dad called. I rolled my eyes and opened to see Stuart. He looked a bit upset.

"Oh. Hi." I gave a small smile. "What are you doing here?"

"We need to talk."

"Molly who...oh." George stood behind me. "Stuart."

"George. Molly it's Tiffany."

I sighed. "Stu I want nothing to do with her. I'm tired of this." I began to walk away until he spoke again.

"She's sick."

I froze and looked at him. "Wha...what?"

"She's in the hospital. She collapsed and we took her to get checked out and the doctors found out yesterday...she might 'ave cancer."

I looked at George and he nodded.

"Take us then." I grabbed my coat.
....

I always hated hospitals. The smell especially. Bleach, cloth and medicines. Often passing a room it was like death. Awful and stomach turning. But there I was, being led to a room with a large window. Another patient sleeping in the bed across from her. She looked....terrible. Her skin was pale, smile weak, thinner and eyes loss of sparkle. What I once remembered of her was a memory.

"Molly you came." She reached out. I wanted to run over and hold her. But the stinging thought of that very day kept me to myself.

"Stuart told me what happened. How did this happen?" I sat on a chair. She sat up and just looked at me. George and Stu took this que to leave. When they did, I spoke.

"Why did you want me Tiffany? I'm sorry for all this but....you hurt me first. I don't exactly know if...I feel sympathy for you." I didn't mean for it to sound so cruel but it was the truth.

"I just wanted to apologize. For everything. For leaving you and...for what happened with Stuart. But you have it all wrong."

I shook my head. "I don"t want to hear it."

"Just...listen. please. Stuart and I never had sex. Nor did we after that day. We were drunk out of our minds and I seduced him to choose me. I guess in a way i was jealous of watching you and Stu be a perfect little couple. Especially that day I arrived back from America. I stayed at yours remember? When you and Stu stayed in London?"

"When John blamed me for the fight."

"Yes. Well I went back to yours and I saw all the paintings and pictures you all had lying around. Stu's sketches of you in bed naked. Or you just simply watching television. Then your photos of stuart at a gallery or at the college. You were the couple we were all jealous of."

"We?" I asked.

"Me, John and George."

I bit my lip and looked at my lap. "I don't understand."

"John pulled me aside that day when we all went to the pub for drinks remember? George's birthday."

I nodded.

"Please forgive me but...we wanted to break you up. John thought you were ruining Stuarts concentration, I was jealous of your relationship and George....he wanted you. So we made a pact. George kept you at his, John talked Stu into enjoying one free night with me and I encouraged him to take drink after drink. It was horribly cruel I know. But I went along with it and....that's when you entered. He had no idea the next morning and when John arrived to the apartment, he mamaged to talk Stu into taking a break from you. He wanted to impress....you. john told him how much you love music and the band and he'd only interest you more if he took the band seriously and rid his love for art. That he become the person he is now."

My eye were welled up with tears. Anger, sadness and pain. My hand clenched in a fist and my head hurt from all of the information.

"N...no. Why would John...George?? He did this! We were happy! I didn't want him to become this! I wanted him for who he was and who he really is! I loved that he spent his time doing something productive! I miss seeing him study and enjoy the simple things life has to give." I wiped my eyes. "Why would he listen to john and not me." I began to cry. "Why would George betray me..." I sobbed.

Tiffany just watched as Stu slowly walked in the room. Coffee in hand.

"Molly.."

"Stuart." I ran into his arms and hugged him tight. He held me and rubbed my back.

"Shhhh love. It's alright."

"No its not. We were lied to! We were broken up and we let it happen! What the fuck is wrong with everyone??"

"Molly I'm sorry." Tiffany said sadly. I turned around and just shook my head.

"You've done enough." Just then george walked in the room. "Both of you." I pointed, grabbing Stu's hand and leading him out with me.
..........