Erin Cuthbert

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Erin Cuthbert

You had started to slip back into that place. It has been so tough staying strong especially for you partner Erin. You have been working so hard, probably too hard. That burnt out feeling was coming back, the sick pit in your stomach was coming back. You started to ache all over, all of the time. You started eating less and less again. Everything was happening again.

You have to stay strong for Erin. Last night you sobbed silently into your pillow, trying to not wake Erin. Soon the soft buzz of the alarm clock woke you up. Erin started to stir next to you, flinging her arm out to turn it off. "Erin?" You asked softly, she hummed in response. "Can you stay here today?" You asked, knowing the response would be a no but you were so tired and just wanted her. You turned to face her, she was already facing you, she held her hand out to hold your face, which you melted into so tired you started to just fall back asleep. "I'm sorry love, I promise I won't be long it's only training okay." She croaked out. You knew the answer was coming, she's been busy with both Millie and Sam being out. She still stroking your cheek, you soon fell asleep.

You woke up with the soft light from the sun. Turning over, reaching over for your phone taking a look at the time it was now 10:15am. Erin's training started at 8am but didn't finish till 12pm. You moved slightly and dear god it felt like you had been hit by a bus. The silence in the apartment was deafening, you hated the silence it meant the voices could get louder. You couldn't even muster up the energy to shower today, which you showered last night after the gym, so it would be fine. You managed to get out of bed and head to the bathroom to brush your teeth. After brushing your teeth you looked in the cabinet mirror, your eyes were slightly red still, bags were forming under your eyes and looking at your hair you found white hairs. You couldn't even be bothered to do anything about any of it, you just walked back into the bedroom getting one of Erin's hoodies and stayed in your pj trousers. You felt so burnt out after everything that even days off like this you just had millions of things running through you head. You never truly got to turn off and relax, that's the issue. Walking out of the bed room you couldn't bring yourself to cook or eat anything that felt like too much of a chore for you. Moving past the kitchen you collapsed on the sofa, grabbing the tv remote and turning on the Netflix show you were watching that didn't take much effort. Pulling the pillows closer to you head and the blanket over you body, you just laid still. You closed your eyes, took a deep breath and cried. The red hot tears fell down your face, yet you were still silent like the night before. Everything was too much for you, it was too much work for your brain, too much of what people were asking for you, too much of everything. You sobbed and sobbed, you eyes were red, cheeks hot from the tears, soon you became exhausted though, slipping back into sleep.

(From more of Erin's pov)

Erin unlocked the door, to hear the soft noise of the tv. Placing her boot bag on the shelf along with her bags, she walked to where the tv was playing. Soon her eyes fell upon you. She had started to notice things though that she had ignored. You looked thinner in the face, eyes a little more sunken in not a lot but noticeable too her, she saw the tear marks on your face. Her heart broke, how did she not notice all of this, she knew you had been working yourself thin on everything you were doing but didn't know it affected you this bad. She didn't wanna wake you so she decided to cook.

One thing about Erin is she is not the best cook. Rifling through the cabinets and fridge. After all of that she decided, to make burritos. Starting with chopping the vegetables. Starting with the avocado, then peppers too and dice some onions. Heating up the pan, cooking the onions, peppers with the mince meat. After cooking that all she put the burritos together; rice, meat, veg and sauce. After it all being down she placed it on a plate and walked over. She sat next to you stroking your cheek waking you up.

(Back to you)

Slowly fluttering your eyes open. Y/c/e meet Erin's blue eyes, "Erin?" You croaked out, she was the only person you wanted right now you felt so weak. "Hi princess." She said softly. "Your home early?" You smiled matching her soft tone. "No my live it's 1:30pm my love." Confused as you didn't think you slept that long. "I'm sorry." You say looking away. Using her fingers to lift your face back to look at her, "No I'm sorry love, I should have paid more attention to you, I didn't know you were struggling I'm sorry, I made you food, you need to eat." She had a worried look in her eyes as she looked at you, made it had gotten worse then you thought. You didn't want to make her worry, you didn't mean to worry anyone. You just started slipping back into that place but tried to cover it. Slowly sitting up you shuffled closer to Erin, throwing your arms around her, "I love you." You whispered trying not to cry, into her shoulder. You clung to her as if your life depended on it and at this moment it did she is all that mattered. You turned to the food that she had made, she knew how much you loved burritos, "Thank you love."
"Why don't we stay in a watch a film on the sofa, let me take care of you." She begged and you honestly couldn't ask for more.
"I love you Erin."

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