Hey so this is a little short but I kinda rushed to get it out cause I am super tired at the moment. This story might be long as in many different chapters and might get a little raw at times but I still hope it's okay. I will also post others that are smaller then however many parts this will be to break it up a little.
Again thank you to everyone
Leah Williamson
(She makes you feel safe. Things are getting worse again, the crying late night in bed in the dark. The pushing yourself too hard. The constant need to compare yourself to others. The anxiety.)
Today was the day. Currently it was 8:30 you had gotten maybe 4-5 hours due to not sleeping previously. Your alarm sounded and you turned it off with a groan. 'Fuck.' You couldn't help but mentally curse yourself. Everything was getting bad again, but you have to carry on like normal. People would ask how you are doing but you just had to say though gritted teeth that you are fine. This week was going to be hard though. Joans thought it would be an amazing idea for the whole squad to go on a trip together. Today was the day of the trip. We would all be picked up in the minibus and taken to a big house in the country side. Of course you would normally jump at the idea but right now in your current state you couldn't think of anything worse. Your bag was packed though and ready to go. You would be picked up last as that was just the way it ended up cause you are the close to the route you guessed.
You had to sling your body out of bed to attempt to have a shower. You were exhausted. Not only physically but mentally, waking up feeling sick, going to sleep feel sick when you can get sleep, being sleep deprived. All of these were what accumulated over time and especially this week. Getting today Friday today was an achievement in its self. After showering you picked out an outfit from what is left of your wardrobe. You decided to go 'comfy'. Stupidly enough this word meant a lot to you. Your teammate and best mate Leah said this so much, but you secretly have feelings for her and she was constantly on your mind. She was the person that pulls you out of your dark times and that's the plus to your trip. Leah. You would be spending time with Leah, most likely sharing a room too. You did go 'comfy' a pair of Nike grey joggers, you could not be asked with a shirt so you just put your weighted hoodie on over your bra. You just brushed your hair out not doing much with it just the usual. You grabbed the last things like chargers and iPads to pack and head downstairs. You slipped on your air forces and locked up the house and waited outside for the minibus. Before long you see it. It pulls in and you dump your bag in the compartment underneath with everyone's and get on. You see her. Her ocean eyes. She smiles at you something she rarely does in general, calling for you to sit next to her.
