Never Beside You × 5SOS

Smells like hellfire (Part 2) - Chp. 10

In the last chapter...

My best friend Debby was in hospital.

When I arrived, a nurse told me that I would have to wait for a time. I asked her if she knew something about Debby, what she did to herself, even though I wasn't that sure if I wanted to hear the answer.

The nurse told me, squeezing my arm right after in a miserable try to comfort me and then had to leave to help somewhere else.

Debby Kenndall, my best friend, was found on the kitchen floor in her apartment. She lay in her own blood, as she slit her wrists with a knife. Her brother Josh found her.

I sat down on one of those waiting chairs where the people waited for the message. A message that could ruin their lifes or let them sigh out of relief. A message that would destroy all your hope or take the pain away which is caused by the dreadful waiting.

My eyes filled with tears and my throat started burning when I started to think of our time together. My breathing got faster. We knew each other our whole lifes long, why did I never notice? My chest was feeling heavy, the lights started spinning above me and suddenly there was nothing but blackness. I was having a panic attack.

I woke up and saw the white ceiling above me. The bright lights blinded me and I closed my eyes again. I heard people talk next to me and I opened them again. It was a nurse and a doctor.

They were whispering, so I couldn't understand what they were talking about. "Um, hello?" I asked confused. I must have passed out or something. "Oh, she's awake," the doctor stated. They turned around and came nearer to me.

"You had a panic attack and fainted, Ms. Peterson. We brought you here. Next to you is a painkiller for your head," the nurse explained.

"Thanks, I don't need one. How's Debby? Is she going to be okay? Can I see her?" My mind was racing. When I asked these questions, the doctor's face already told me what I needed to know.

"Ms. Peterson...we're sorry. She had lost too much blood already, nothing would work, it was too late." Too late. The words hit me like a punch in the face. Or a stone. "Then you didn't try hard enough," I stated, swallowing the tears. I ran out and they were yelling my name after me, but I didn't want to stay here.

When I finally sat in my car, I couldn't do anything but scream. People stared at me, but I didn't care. I lost my best friend, goddamn it! I started to sob uncontrollably while I started the car. I couldn't stop crying and if the hospital wasn't near my house, I probably would have crashed the car.

I opened the door to our apartment and threw it shut loudly. Then I let myself slide to the floor with my back leaning on the door. I buried my head in between my knees and arms and cried. I heard footsteps and Caroline sat down next to me.

She hugged me carefully, not knowing if I would push her away, but I didn't. I literally fell into her arms and cried even more, but I was thankful that she was there. After crying my eyes out, we stood up and Caroline made tea for me. Then we watched Supernatural together, but it didn't really help me to get my mind off.

I was really exhausted, so I went to my room. I changed my clothes to a big shirt and comfy shorts.
Then I sat in my bed and stared at the door for what felt like hours. Suddenly, a familar noise came from next to me and I recognized it as my ringtone.

It was Michael. I didn't answer right away, as I wanted to be alone. He tried it another two times and I finally answered.

"Hey, Jade! So you didn't have my flannel, huh?" He greeted me in a happy voice. "I guess." I replied seriously. Silence.

"Hey.. did I do something wrong?" I sighed. "No, it's just, ... I'm not really having a good day, you know?" I said, the memories were still fresh in my head. "What happened? I can tell by your voice that you're sad. You know that you can talk to me about everything, Jade," he said supportively.

"I kind of don't want to talk about it, there's really nothing that it would change. How's your tour going?" I asked to change the topic.

"Okay, um...we were in Amsterdam yesterday and it was just like everytime, really awesome. Right now we're about to eat at Pizza Hut," he told me. He went on and after talking for a while we hung up.

I continued to lie in my bed and after staying there the whole day, I fell asleep somehow.

Eventually the pain subsided. But it had not entirely disappeared, it was only less violent.

Michael

We were sitting at a small table in Pizza Hut, and although we were having fun, I just couldn't enjoy it. I was worried about Jade. She sounded really down, like, so much worse than the time when she had nightmares and I woke up to her sobbing on the ground. What happened?

Suddenly I saw a hand in front of my face and I was back in reality. Ashton looked at me with a worried expression. "Hey buddy, are you alright? You spaced out a bit," he stated. "Yeah, no, it's Jade. I talked to her earlier and she seemed really sad." I explained.

"Don't worry too much, I'm sure Caroline will take care of her." He gave me a supportive smile and we continued eating.

Caroline

I was really worried about Jade. She nearly didn't do anything but stay in her bed. She ate less and she didn't make videos anymore. I still didn't know what happened and I didn't ask, because confronting her would probably make it worse again.

A week after she started being that way, she went out dressed all black and then it hit me: She went to a funeral. When she came back, she told me everything and now I knew why she was so miserable. Debby was really important to her.

Months went by, Laura moved to her boyfriend and Calum and me talked every day. I told him about Jade, because she stopped answering Michael and he was really worried, Calum told me. I felt sorry for him, but I couldn't tell Jade to talk to him.

Calum had told me that their tour was over and one day, the boys, Catherine and Jazmyne were standing at our doorstep.

"Surprise!"

*Adele voice* Hello, it's me

Just kidding. How did you like this chapter? I know, it's different, but that was needed for the storyline. Hope you like it, don't forget to vote and leave a comment! :)

- likeaschnitzel