Chapter 26

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Chapter 26: A Cooking Disaster

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"Gege how do u get merits?" While you walked to the marketplace you were on a call with your brother

"Merits are the currency in the heavens, I'm fr broke there. Can you-"
"Go to my bank account."
"Huh?"

That was a sudden reply "Meimei, while you were away. I answered the prayers of your followers and my followers at the same time. Your merits and my merits are in the same bank account, which is mine"

"H-how do i open your bank in the heavens? I didn't even know banks exists there!" However your brother simply sighed "Go ask father, he knows how. I have to go now, i have a meeting to attend. Take care."

With a beep he hung up and you groaned "I don't wanna go back there and face another lecture from papa..."  The lecture was just Jun Wu tutoring you about how the three realms work and despite your interest in the topic, his lectures can be overbearing.

So after you bought groceries you went back to the hill. And saw the most hilarious scene ever.

Guzi was swinging Qi Rong back and forth after being tricked by Xie Lian to which he said "Your dad would get bored if he just stay still, why don't you play with him?"

Qi Rong was tied to a new tree, this time more bigger and sturdier than the last. He struggled and kept cursing at Xie Lian, saying he's the most merciless, despicable and sly among the three realms for doing this to his cousin.

"Baobei, what did you buy?" Xie Lian being a gentleman, helped you carrying the heavy basket filled with various ingredients. He was clearly enjoying the cry for help from Qi Rong

"I'll be cooking up some dishes that you guys don't know about, it's a surprise" You thought of making pater, ginisang ampalaya and tortang talong. All are filipino dishes.

It's boring to stick to the same cuisine of food everyday, and you wanted the villagers to try foreign foods. Because of your skills your master would always assign you in the kitchen saying that you're a culinary connoisseur.

"Look little kid! There's your jiejie! Now let go of me!" Qi Rong's words caught Guzi, and once the child saw you following Xie Lian inside the shrine. The child wasted no time to run up to you. Leaving Qi Rong alone tied on the tree branch.

Xie Lian already set the outdoor table and you set up the outdoor kitchen. Guzi helped carrying the small less heavy ingredients. Xie Lian watched with a smile, letting the child do as he please.

"So, what are you making? Can i help?" The moment Xie Lian said that "No! (Name) Wu! Never ever let him step in the kitchen! He has the most shittiest and poisonous cooking in all of the three realms!" Qi Rong wailed and pleaded you who was still tied to a tree.

"Chill bro! He'll only lend the ingredients to my hand!" You exclaimed back to which Qi Rong was still unsatisfied "Now then, you two, be my assistants. I'll cook a huge feast with new dishes"

"Can you explain the food we will make?" Xie Lian asked, Guzi stood beside him, you chuckle seeing your two new assistants.

"First is Pater, i gathered enough banana leaves. It's just rice and the toppings are shredded meat, it can be chicken, beef or fish. But the key to a good pater is how the toppings are seasoned and how the rice is cooked"

"Next is ginisang ampalaya, its basically fried bitter melon with eggs. Lastly, tortang talong. It's a perfect blend of eggplants and eggs. Let's get started with boiling the eggplants..."

But first, you made sure to tie your hair and roll up your long sleeves with a clip. Tortang talong's eggplant needs to be boiled or grilled before frying with the skin being peeled off so that the flesh is tender for frying.

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