A Piece of The Sun

4. I Forget Myself

Jean POV

Don't come to dinner

- Carter

He messaged me saying not to come to dinner, there was no question about why. If Carter didn't want me there, it was because Noah had received my message and maybe, just maybe he hated me. But I need him now, he is the only one that would understand, he had to be. I poured my heart out to him begging for help, I'm not strong enough to do this alone, I can't find it inside of me like he can.

Or was he that heartless that he ignored my pleas for help while my wife chips away at me a little bit more each day? Over the last five years, Dallas has become a bigger monster than the day before and she does it so smoothly, I didn't even notice it at first. How was I supposed to know I was another target? I wasn't even considered as a human to her, but a trophy. I hadn't seen the abuse pebbling up until one day she came home, I was putting dinner on the table for her and she nearly stabbed the knife through my hand during an outburst when I challenged her mind one iota further than her two-revolving brain cells.

I like to engage in stimulating conversation. Dallas doesn't.

I had never been so scared as the night she did that to me. Perhaps I didn't stand up to her when I should have when she'd insult my clothing, the way I fixed my hair, or how I simply danced with partners at the company. I was concerned with putting food on the table, keeping our house, and keeping her happy.

Dallas climbed new heights with her cycles of psychological abuse. She would show up unannounced to practices, offering me lunch that was ten times too small, unsustainable foods, and giving me things I didn't like to eat. Leaving me notes in my lunch and dinner saying "Watch yourself", "Break a leg!" and my favorite: "Don't stretch yourself thin". Dallas had worked in a small amount of time to secure me as a pawn in her seemingly endless spar against Noah.

In the email, I told Noah everything. Whatever happened to him being there like he said he wanted to, what happened to papa entrusting him to look after me if anything should happen to him? After all, something did happen to papa. He stopped believing in me the day I agreed to marry Dallas, he told me I was making a mistake and that I would learn my lesson, he saw she was no good and I was young and naive, I was having such a good time that I didn't want it to end. And now papa will hardly talk to me as is.

If I shouldn't come to dinner then why come at all? Why bother?

As much as had every reason not to go now, Dallas wasn't having it. "You're going," Dallas declared.

Dallas toted me along with her despite the "fact" of my illness. She bought a variety of vitamins and shots to keep them all at bay. I feigned my illness enough to convince her to let me stay in our hotel suite, she was disappointed but she was willing to risk it. She wouldn't want to be labeled as a bad wife if she took me out while I was sick and endangered others in my illness.

She took both of the room keys, ensuring I stayed locked in our suite. I wasn't swayed by her locking me in, I was quite used to it now when I did something she didn't like, she'd lock me away to teach me a lesson. At first, I was terrified, and in no way should I have normalized these behaviors but what was I going to do with Dallas, being the dominating force she is, her emptiness scared me. It was not the taunts and torture, she could stale the air in seconds with looks alone. I just wanted it to stop because by now I was leaving and feeling as empty as her every time I did it.

I snuck out of the suite, asking the concierge where I found a decent meal. She told me to leave the quarter and go a few miles out, to a restaurant known for their bouillabaisse, and down the road was a club called "LaLaurie" where the drinks were nothing but stiff, the destination spot to drown and wipe away your sorrows.