Asul

36

Chapter 36

The truth is, life will amaze you in the most stunning ways, and it will also break your heart. Life will give you the kinds of lessons that grow you and build you and help you to bloom into the person you have always hoped to be, but it will also carry within it the kinds of losses that stay with you, that change you and mold you in uncomfortable ways. Life will demand for you to do the work, for you to understand yourself, for you to heal even when it hurts. For you to be brave, for you to fight for yourself.

At the end of the day, bravery isn't a battlefield. It isn't fast cars, or stunted risk. Bravery is the quietest thing you will ever know.

Maayos naman ang relasyon namin ni Gabe, gaya noon ay tuluyan na ngang bumalik ang dati naming relasyon.

Isang umaga, biyernes ng araw na iyon nang makatanggap ako ng isang mensahe mula sa lalaki.

bata:
Baby..

bata:
Kumalat na sa brain ang cancer ni mama

Isang mensahe lang ito pero pakiramdam ko ay nadurog sa milyong piraso ang puso ko. Kung ganito ang epekto ng balitang ito sa akin, paano pa kaya sa kaniya?

I dial his number right away after I read his messages. I want to make sure that there's someone on his side.

"Please, be patience to me.. again"  Pabulong na sabi nito sa akin. "Hintayin mo ulit ako, pasensya na kung mangangako na naman ako sa 'yong, babawi ako sa 'yo." Dagdag niya.

"Gabe, ano ka ba naman. Kahit gaano katagal ay maghihintay ako sa 'yo." Untal ko sa kaniya.

"Ang isipin mo na muna ngayon ay ang Mama mo.." Dagdag ko.

Mabigat ito para sa kanila sapagkat parang bumalik sila sa simula dahil kumalat na ito pati sa utak ni Tita.

Pabalik-balik ulit sila Gabe sa ospital para sa gamutan ni tita.

Gabe had to focus again on her mom kaya madalas ay wala siya sa klase, dahil kapag hindi kayang samahan ng Papa niya ang Mama niya dahil sa work, Gabe takes the responsibility. Katuwang naman niya ang Papa niya but Gabe is very hands on when it comes to his family.

I really feel bad for Tita, I know how tired she is, sana ay malagpasan niya ang lahat ng ito.

bata:
Baby, I'll update you later.

Baby:
oki, baby!

Throughout the morning class, Gabe was just staring at the board. Before, he's active in class for participating pero ngayon animo'y walang gana ang lalaki mag-aral, well I understand him but I'm really worried for him.

When it's finally our lunch break, Gabe and I decided to eat in his pick-up truck far from our school.

We went to our usual tambayan kapag nalulungkot ang isa sa amin. It's on the hill of the mountain. The school is visible in this sight and also the busy streets of South Trinidad.

We're at the back of his pick-up truck. Sitting on the floor. I can smell the fresh air of the greens on the top of the mountain.

"Here, eat more, Baby." I said softly.

I handed him the food that I cooked earlier. I cooked him food because I know that no one in his family will cook food for him so I hope that this little gesture will be less hussle for him.

"Thank you." He thanked me and I just gave him a smile.

Looking at him makes me feel worried. He was just staring at the food I gave him. Staring at him makes me feel that he really needs strength to still fight. Gabe needs me, I want to give him strength.