not that easy

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My head has been hurting since I woke up. We moved my stuff out of Eleanor's house this morning. This is the opposite of what the outcome of this trip was supposed to be. Maybe I should talk to her. But I don't know how. I don't even know if I'm mad at her or not. Will asked if I still love her and I couldn't lie. He also asked if I think she still loves me. I wanted to say yes because I'm so sure that has to be true and I want it to be true so bad, but even if she does...it's not that easy. He asked why I don't just ask her but he doesn't get it. Yeah, part of me is scared they'll say they don't. Mostly though, I just don't know what I'd do if she said she does. We wouldn't be the same as before. Maybe we could be, eventually. It would take a bit. I don't know what I'm supposed to do.

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