She's always upset about something, it feels like. Part of me blames myself for being a bad girlfriend and the other part is angry. Why do you have to be so dramatic. It's so hard to stay strong for myself, let alone for her. I feel like I'm trapped in a hole and every time I get close to climbing out I slip back down in again. I don't know what to do. Feels like we're falling apart again. I don't want us to be like Will and Nico. What am I doing? Why am I trying to push her away when I should be holding on tighter than ever. Gods I'm stupid. I don't know how I'm supposed to deal with all these emotions bubbling up inside me. Not when I need to be strong for everyone else. I wonder if she feels the same though. Like she has to be strong for me. Like I'm not trying. I don't know who's to blame for that. I don't know how much more of this I can take. I'm tired.
