Chapter 35: Offsetting

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The next day we fly back to Barcelona. I have a day off since there'll be no team training today, but Gavi and I split ways at the airport because he has an interview he needs to attend. As always he invited me to watch it from another room in the facility, but tired from the long day I had yesterday I choose to go home and rest. I'll catch his interview on tv.

Xavi gives me a ride home, letting me know he can only drop me off before taking off again. Entering the house it feels like I'm returning home from a long vacation rather than a two day trip. The house feels different, new.

Restless and wanting to stay awake for Gavi's interview in half an hour, I go outside with a ball to work on my juggling. Juggling has always been a skill I've struggled with. I've improved drastically in the past years and even more so recently since Gavi has been giving me tips. Now it is a task I can complete without too much thought, which is good seeing as at the moment my mind is wondering.

I have potentially the biggest decision in my life to make and less than a month to do so. I could stay here in Barcelona or I could go home to Canada. Right now I don't even know which way I'm leaning. Maybe the fact that I'm even questioning it means I should stay; if I fail here I can always return, reapply and go to University afterwards. But deep down I know I can't, I thrive off the validation I receive from accomplishing things young, restarting a life path in four years doesn't seem like a genuine option.

On the completely none career path, I have Gavi and my new family here, and my old family there. Both feel impossible to leave, but the disappointment my parents will have in me if I decide to stay here is daunting. They don't know about Gavi and I, I intend to tell them, but over the phone seems wrong. Getting my first boyfriend feels like an in person piece of information, however if I do get to see them in person soon that means Gavi and I will be over. Despite his hope I know we wouldn't last long distance. It's not fair to either of us no matter how much we love each other.

I gulp, catching the ball I've flicked up to my hands. I re-enter the house, reassuring myself I don't need to make any decisions right now. I go over to the couch, discarding the ball at the back door, and sit down. I pick up the remote and flip the channel to the one he'll be on any moment now. I relax back in the couch, comforted by being able to hear his voice again soon.

"Today we're here with futbol star Gavi," the man on the screen says, sitting next to Gavi on a lounge couch. Gavi smiles for the camera in acknowledgment. "He has recently returned from his match yesterday where he scored one of three fantastic goals. What do you have to say to that?" he asks Gavi.

Gavi shrugs slightly, it's not a very direct question and therefore hard to answer. "It was a good match with a positive outcome for my team," he says dryly. Technically these interviews are supposed to be about talking to the players but in reality you're supposed to say what everyone wants to hear. 'It was a good match' or 'both teams played phenomenal' are easy outs. I'm not particularly good at following rules; during my interviews I say what I really mean and hope it doesn't come back to bite me in the ass.

"Barcelona is on quite the winning streak at the moment," the man says. "Some would attest that to the new player Xavi has recruited for the team." Of course he moves the conversation right over to me; that's all anyone ever wants from either of us, to talk about the other.

Gavi smiles more genuinely at the mention of me and it warms my heart, dissipating the rage that had started to boil up in me. "I would say that, yes. She contributed two assists yesterday as well as several additional goals and assists in the past games."

"So you side with Xavi in his attempt to make history by having the first ever female playing in the men's La Liga?" he asks it as if it's really a question, even after what Gavi said seconds before. Say Gavi didn't believe in me, he would never publicly speak against his manager.

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