Body Dropper (Dazai x Reader x Chuuya)

~ Chapter Twenty One ~

"Odasaku! What's up?" Dazai said, greeting the man walking down the stairs. Dazai had been sitting alone in the Lupin bar the past few minutes, drinking his usual drink with an ice ball in it.

The cat sitting beside Dazai meowed before getting up and moving to another chair. "Sorry to wake you sensei." Dazai smiled at the furry creature.

"Sensei? Why'd you call him that?"

"Just look how wise he looks, he even gives up his seat when I have guests." Dazai turned to the man. "So you're not going to believe what happened today! There was a shootout inside a warehouse!"

"Really?"

"I ended up trading shots with a very energetic group of guys!! Their truck had a machine gun!"

"Sounds like a rather hairy situation..." The bartender put down a drink for Oda to drink as he slowly stopped listening to the energetic boy.

"So those injuries of yours, I'm assuming you got those from the hail of bullets?"

"Actually, that's my own fault 'cause I had to pee... In a rush I tripped right into a ditch!" dazai smiled, leaning onto the bar counter.

"Is that so? I guess if you got to go, you got to go..."

"True..." Dazai played with the ice in his drink. "In the end, those guys fell right into my trap and ran away crying. Even though I barely roughed them up..."

"I really thought they'd take me out.. I was really disappointed..."

The biggest misfortune for Dazai's enemies is that they are Dazai's enemies...

"Aww man!" Dazai said as he stretched. "Isn't there some reliable way for me to commit suicide somewhere?!"

"Doubt it.."

"Odasaku."

"Hm?"

"Man fears death, but at the same time... Is drawn to it. Death is endlessly consumed in literature... In cities, in life, the singler event that cannot be reversed. That is what I pursue and desire." Dazai smiled at the man.

"Barkeep! One glass of bleach please!"

"We're all out." the old man said, cleaning one of his glasses.

Dazai spun around in his chair sadly. "Aww, that's a shame... How about a bleach-based cocktail?"

"Were All out."

"Looks like your out of luck..." Oda told the boy as he enjoyed his drink.

"You shouldn't let him talk like that Odasaku."

"Hm?"

"He might not go off the rails if you called him out every now and then," Ango spoke as he walked down the stairs of the bar.

"Ango!" Dazai said excitedly.

"Although a hammer to the head might work better than words... Just a tomato juice, I have to drive."

"It's been a while! How's work been?"

Ango sat down, setting his bag on his lap. "Today was pretty rough, buying the necessary smuggled items was tedious. After hours of negotiating all I got was this watch. This rounds out about 74% of transactions that have taken place-"

Ango continued to talk as Odasaku blocked his words out, not wanting to hear about his tedious job.

Dazai laughed, "So... It sounds like you fuzzed your job too then!"

"Fuzzed?"

"That's right! We're fuzz buddies! Come to think of it, it's been a long time since we first became drinking buddies... But I don't think I've heard you complain about work." Dazai turned to the man on his right.