Love and War - Aemond/Aegon Targaryen

Chapter 4

“Helaena?” Arlenna called into the dim light of the queen's chambers. Her voice was uncertain, gentle, sweet in a way she reserved only for Helaena.
These days, Arlenna didn't have many people left to be gentle with. She'd never been a kind girl like Helaena. She'd never been gifted with the Queen's delicate nature. Perhaps that was what kept her going through all the horrors, but she'd often wished to be more like Helaena.
And now with her friend so lost in this cloud of darkness, she found herself fearing that Helaena would lose her way in it.
Whether she became jaded like Arlenna and Aemond and Aegon, or she found it too suffocating to cope, Arlenna didn't want to live in a world without Helaena's light.
So, more days than not, she came to see her friend. To try and pull her out of that dark place.
“My love, how are you feeling?”
Helaena didn't answer. She just kept staring out of the window.
“Have you eaten today?” Arlenna tried, slowly walking over. “Have you had enough to drink?”
Still no answer.
“My love?” Arlenna persisted, gently reaching out to touch her friend on the arm.
Helaena jolted, her violet eyes wide as she stared up at Arlenna. There was a look of utter terror etched onto her face.
“It's alright, it's just me.” The Hightower whispered, her voice soft and soothing as if she were speaking to Visenya or Jaehaera. “Have you eaten? Have you had some water?”
“No thank you.” Helaena managed, her gaze slowly shifting back out towards the window.
Arlenna gave her hand a gentle squeeze. “Will you come and say goodbye to your brothers, my love? They both leave this afternoon.”
“More wars. More fighting. More death.”
“They are keeping us safe, Hel. Keeping our family safe.”
A flicker of pain washed over Helaena's face at the poor choice of words and Arlenna instantly wished she could take them back. Instead she sighed, pouring out a cup of water for her friend and passing it over to her.
“Aegon would want to see you there.” She tried again. “Aemond would too.”
There was no answer.
“Helaena, we miss you. We all miss you.”
The Queen slowly reached out, taking a long sip of water from the cup that Arlenna had passed over.
She did not say another word, but gently she squeezed Arlenna's hand.
It was something at least. Some small sign that her friend was still there.

Many had come to see the King off, Helaena not included, but Arlenna and Alicent stood at the front of the line. While Alicent spoke to her eldest son, Arlenna focused on her husband.
Cole was readying the rest of the men while some of the other lords all tried to inch their way into conversations with the King and the Prince.
“And you won't do anything foolish?”
“When have I ever?” Aemond asked with the smallest hints of a smirk.
She couldn't help but grin, even as fear clung to her insides and gripped her very soul.
“I mean it. I want you home, do you understand?”
“We will be fine.” He told her, taking both her hands in his and pressing them to his lips.
Arlenna sighed, resting her head on his shoulder for a long moment.
“I will never forgive you if you don't come back. You and I have lots to do.”
“Hm? Like what?”
She looked up at him, rolling her eyes but unable to keep the wide smile at bay. “I have plans of my own, dear husband. And in those plans, I have a living, unharmed, husband and lots of little tiny Aemonds running around.”
“Really? Will we call them all 'tiny Aemond' or will they be allowed names?”
“We shall see.”
The Prince leaned down, kissing her once... Then twice... Then again. “I will come home to you. I promise.” He said, his voice so sturdy that she was sure she would always be safe so long as he was there. “I have loved you for as long as I've known how to love. I will not leave you now.”
“Good. Because death wouldn't protect you if you did. I'd find you and drank you back to the land of the living myself.”
He let out a small laugh, shaking his head. “I believe you.”
In the corner of her eye, Arlenna saw Alicent approaching them.
With great difficulty, she peeled herself away from Aemond and straightened her skirts.
She gave the old queen a small smile before her attention turned to Aegon.
Without even looking at him, she could feel Aemond's gaze burning into her as she approached the King, but she paid him no mind.
She had to say goodbye, even if they were both going to be fine. Even if she and Aegon were not what they used to be.
When she'd been drowning, when she'd been kicking and screaming for dear life beneath the surface of the water, it hadn't only been Aemond and her child that she'd thought of.
She'd thought of Aegon too. Of how things had ended between them. If how she'd never get to say goodbye.
She wasn't going to make that mistake again.
“Your Grace,” She bowed her head, “you still owe me a ride on Sunfyre, you know?”
The corners of his mouth quirked upwards into that boyish grin of his and it made Arlenna smile.
“Of course, sweet sister, how could I forget?”
“Well, see that you remember that. I don't want to see you become an oathbreaker, my King.”
“Don't fear. Sunfyre and I shall return to do as you please, as always.”
“Good.” She answered, folding her arms. “And you'll be careful? I would hate for something to happen to that pretty face of yours, it's your only redeeming quality.”
“My Kingly face will be well protected, I promise.”
“Good.” She nodded.
There was a long, awkward, silence between them as a teary eyed Alicent fussed over her soldier son.
Aemond's glare wasn't burning so intensely, he'd been distracted by his loving mother, and Aegon took the opportunity to grab Arlenna's hands.
She stared at him for a moment as he entwined their fingers and sighed.
“Thank you.” He said quietly, those sad eyes of his peering over at her in a way she couldn't quite understand. “If I don't see you again–”
“None of that. You will come home. You're a survivor, my King. So survive. Come home and... And make sure my husband comes home to me too. Both of you look after each other. I couldn't... I couldn't bare it if anything happened...”
“I will.” He told her finally, accepting that she wouldn't hear any mournful goodbyes or talk of death. No matter what he still had to tell her. He hoped she knew already. He hoped the look on his face was enough.
He didn't get to kiss her as Aemond had. He didn't get to tell her that he loved her, that he'd never stopped.
Instead, he sighed and pulled his hands from hers. “I wouldn't want to incur your wrath.”
“No.” She smiled. “No, you wouldn't.”
Aegon gulped back all the words that were stuck in his throat, struggling to keep it all inside like he'd been taught to do his entire life. He nodded briefly and then he was gone, mounting Sunfyre without looking back at her.
Aemond approached again for one final goodbye.
He pulled Arlenna in without hesitation, one last passionate kiss before he left for battle.
This was part of their childhood dream – Arlenna seeing off her husband, who they'd both decided would be Aemond, as he went to fight in great battles. But it wasn't as romanticised as when they'd imagined it as children.
That fear had a hold of her. A fear that she might never see him again. The reality of war was not as beautiful and story-like as she'd imagined growing up.
“I love you, Aemond Targaryen.” She said as they parted.
The smallest hints of a smile crossed over him, before he too was leaving them behind and mounting Vhagar.
Arlenna and Alicent locked arms – two Hightower women, both linked in their love and their fear.
From atop Sunfyre, Aegon had his eyes on them.
Vhagar gave an almighty roar.
And then they were off. Soaring up into the clouds and towards the bloody battle which awaited them at Rook's Rest.
Arlenna wanted to reach out, to try and grab them both from the sky and pull them back to the Keep.
But there was nothing she could do.
So, she held onto Alicent for dear life and tried her best to push back her tears.