Help//5sos ✔️

22.

i woke up the next morning to calum gently shaking my shoulder.

"hey babe, ashton's waiting for you." he whispered.

"why so early." i complained.

"i don't make the schedule. take it up with him." calum chuckled as i stood up slowly.

i grabbed the blanket on the bed and began to follow behind calum half asleep.

calum knocked on the office door and of course ashton was bouncing off walls at 7 am in the morning.

"hey princess!" he smiled brightly.

"hi." i replied blandly as i sat down in the chair and curled up in the blanket.

"someone's not a morning person." calum pointed out.

"calum hood, you have absolutely no room to talk about that." ashton laughed as he shot him a look.

i cracked a smile before slightly sitting up.

"so, i heard from calum that you wanted to recover?" ashton asked softly.

i nodded stiffly. "for the first time yesterday, i saw how actually skinny i was becoming."

"i see, that's progress in the right direction already. is there anything you want to start with?" ashton asked.

i looked over at calum and he gently put his arm around me in support.

"bee. my best friend. i don't know how to tell her she's making me feel sick." i spoke softly.

"i'm happy we're talking about this actually. i think she needs to get some help, like you do, before you can attempt a strong friendship again." ashton spoke.

"i think you built your friendship around anorexia, instead of building it around love for one another." ashton added.

i nodded in agreement.

"how about we give bee a call, and you tell her how you're feeling." ashton suggested.

"if i need help, can you jump in?" i asked.

"that's exactly what i'm here for." ashton smiled.

i slowly picked up my phone and called beatrice.

"hey bee." i spoke softly.

"what's up liyah?" she asked.

"i-i need to talk to you." i stuttered.

"oh no, are you in trouble?" she spoke quickly.

"n-no, i want to get better." i replied.

"get better? liyah you aren't even sick. what do you mean?" she asked.

"i want to recover from anorexia bee. it's killing me." i whispered.

"no no baby, you don't. do you want to be fat again? do you want to be judged?" beatrice spoke almost pleading with me to stay.

i felt tears enter my eyes.

"of course not." i mumbled.

"then stay with me babes. you're my ana and i'm yours. i can't do this without you." she replied.

before i could respond ashton cut in, "beatrice? hey, my names dr. ashton irwin. i'm a friend of aaliyah's brother. i'm also a shrink. i've noticed since day one that you're relationship with liyah is extremely toxic."

"i don't mean to be rude, but this is between liyah and i." beatrice spoke firmly.

"not anymore. she needs help and so do you. anorexia is a serious illness beatrice." ashton spoke swiftly.

"liyah are you still there?" beatrice asked.

"i am." i replied.

"if you quit on me, i'll kill myself." she whispered.

i felt my blood run could and face pale drastically.

calum quickly grabbed grabbed my phone and said, "that's not fair, she wants to recover. don't threaten suicide like that. if you truly need help call 000."

"it's seems you made your choice liyah. i'll be sure to let you parents know before i die. this is all your fault." beatrice whispered before she hung up.

i felt my hands begin to shake as i slowly brought them over my face.

calum went to touch me when i jumped up and backed away and began to pace.

"fuck what have i done." i muttered into my hands.

i began to dig my nails into my skin, calum must've noticed because he stood up and grabbed my hands and held them apart from each other.

"what beatrice does is on her. you have nothing to do with what she decides to do. understood?" calum spoke as he stared at me dead in the eyes.

i shakily nodded and sat back down.

we sat there for about an hour because i couldn't control my emotions and breathing. i felt like my world was ending.

all of a sudden calum's phone started to ring and i saw mom's name pop up.

i immediately started to dig in nails into my skin again as calum answered the phone.

"let me hear." i whispered.

i saw calum glance over at ashton and ashton gave him a swift nod.

"hey mom, liyah and ash are here too." calum spoke nervously.

"liyah baby, i'm so sorry." mom began.

i immediately felt my walls shoot up and i felt tears begin to shoot down my face.

"no, mom. please?" i whispered as i began to wipe the tears that were falling down my face.

"i'm sorry baby, beatrice ended her life today."